As excitement mounts over the possibility of the Phillies signing free agent Bryce Harper, hater theorists are coming out of the woodwork to bash our fair city.
Excuse us? This city is a national treasure. So much so, in fact, that it was featured in the movie “National Treasure” starring national treasure Nicolas Cage. Need we say more?
Listen, this city-bashing from those who hate us cause they ain’t us is nothing we haven’t heard before — or all the time: Philly is mean. Philly threw snowballs at Santa. Philly is where Legionnaires‘ disease was identified (we’re seriously confused about why nobody uses that last one. It’s much worse than snowballs).
So when Washington Post feature writer Steve Hendrix took to Twitter to bash Philly and back up a fellow Post reporter who claims to be a Phillies fan, he probably expected to be just one of a chorus of voices trashing Philly.
First among the best responses was the standard — but always appropriate — it’s “Always Sunny in Philadelphia” meme:
Then, of course, there was a slapback comment involving our evil overlord and savior, Gritty.
Several people noted the absurdity of someone in Washington, D.C., commenting on the “corrupt, corrosive culture of negativity” in Philly.
And some Phillies fans felt they had to come clean about their real motivations for wanting Harper:
Others noted that the only known instance of Harper actually being assaulted during a Phillies game was when his own teammate on the Washington Nationals went after his throat.
What really threw us off, though, was this totally sane, politely worded response that didn’t end with an expletive but with a “How dare u!” We think this person is either a Philadelphia transplant or might actually be ready to explode with rage.
As many Philadelphians pointed out, plenty of “known nice guys,” from Nick Foles to Carlos Ruiz, have not only survived, but thrived, in Philadelphia — as do 1.58 million of us every day.
This is not a city that’s about nice — it’s a city that’s about being real. If you want nice, go to Minnesota. If you want someone to hold a door for you, go to Wawa.
What Harper — or anyone — who comes to Philly will get is a clear idea of where you stand, immediately. There are no false niceties, but there are good people. And when we band together behind a person, an idea, or a team, we’re unstoppable.
This really is a city of dreams, Bryce.