Hey, The Ladies! Have you ever spent the night at your boyfriend's place? Or, maybe you're not into labels (that's cool, that's cool), but you HATE having to traipse home after crashing at your Casual Sex Partner's apartment across town. Either way, get ready to kiss those troubles goodbye thanks to the totally-not-at-all-misogynistic Walk of Shame Kit.
Yup, it's a real thing that will only set you back $34.99 U.S. dollars.
It is the act of going home the next morning and being embarrassed in your clothes from the night before. There is no longer a need to be embarrassed by doing the "walk of shame", all of your problems are solved with the Walk of Shame™ Kit. It's everything you'll need to walk home with your head held high.
It's got a pair of flip-flops, a dress, and even "call/don't call" cards you can leave behind when you slink out of there without him noticing because, you know, actually interacting with the person you just slept with is totally out of the question.
Over at Jezebel, Rebecca Rose rightfully takes the Walk of Shame Kit folks to task.
I personally think this is the kind of silly thing you buy if want to blow $34.99 to support whatever charity/nonprofit cause happens to be attached to it (in this case, breast cancer awareness). Not because you're actually going to carry around some stupid big tin in your purse that says Walk of Shame™ kit that you whip out like "OMG I just had a one night stand! Thank goodness I have my trusty Walk of Shame™ kit here with me though." That seems about as random and awkward as all those times Batman would magically produce some highly specialized tool that would perfectly fit whatever bizarre trap some villain had set for him in. It's like how Batman's shoes just happen to turn into ice skates right when they encounter Mr. Freeze. I'm saying these kits will make you look like a cartoonish superhero in a campy 1960's television show.
One thing confuses me with these kits—do they sell them for dudes? Because in my "one-night-stand" era (picture a lot of rotary phones and parachute pants) you know, sometimes the guy would come over to my place and have to do his own walk of shame. (Or do we not call it that for men? It's just "walking home after spending the night at someone's place," isn't it?)
Either way, The Fellas, if you're sick of all the mad chicks you lay, bro, stealing your favorite T-shirts, you too can own a Walk of Shame Kit for just $34.99.
And for you guys, aren't you tired of her taking your favorite tee-shirt the morning after to walk home in. Your problem is now solved, keep a Walk of Shame™ Kit in your house and you don't have to worry about calling her to get your favorite tee back again.