Melina Waldo, leader in parents of gay people group

In May 2003, Melina Mazza Waldo went to Washington to lobby Congress as a member of the Philadelphia chapter of Parents and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG).

"I had an encounter on Capitol Hill with a clergyman, who loudly interrupted me and pushed me as I was being interviewed by a reporter," she later wrote in The Inquirer.

She said her son, Craig, told her at the time: " 'You're their worst nightmare, Mom!' He explained that the last thing the far right wants people to see is a mother speaking up for her gay child."

Mrs. Waldo, 76, of Haddonfield, a former national, regional and local official for PFLAG, died of cardiovascular disease Monday, Oct. 6, at her home.

Diane Marini recalled that Mrs. Waldo shared a significant moment in her life.

In 2002, Marini and her partner, Marilyn Maneely, were about to challenge state marriage laws by seeking a marriage license in Haddonfield.

"When I called her to ask her to be our witness, she said it took her breath away," Marini said. "She never expected to hear those words - gay marriage - in our lifetime."

Officials denied Marini and Maneely's request.

On June 26 of the year, Marini and Maneely joined six other same-sex New Jersey couples in a lawsuit, which eventually led to legalization of same-sex marriage in New Jersey in 2013, she said.

Maneely, Marini's partner for 15 years, died of Lou Gehrig's disease in 2005.

As Maneely was dying, Marini said, "Melina would come over and help me take care of her in whatever way I needed."

Mrs. Waldo, she said, "was a wonderful woman."

Frances Kirschner, president from 2002 to 2004 of the PFLAG Philadelphia chapter, which also draws its members from the Pennsylvania and New Jersey suburbs, said Mrs. Waldo was chapter vice president during her term.

From 1997 to 2001, Mrs. Waldo was a national board member of PFLAG, then director in the 2000s of the region that covered New York, New Jersey, and Pennsylvania, Kirschner said.

"She had a way of communicating to parents, to political figures," the concerns of PFLAG, Kirschner said. "She was able to articulate all the love we have for our gay and lesbian children."

Born in Braddock, near Pittsburgh, she earned a bachelor's degree magna cum laude at Pennsylvania State University in 1960 and a master's in social work at the University of Pittsburgh in 1988, daughter Elise Major said.

Mrs. Waldo was an elementary-school teacher in Allegany, N.Y., from 1960 to 1965, but left the workforce to raise her family while accompanying her husband, Richard, on assignments in Paris and Tokyo as a sales executive for an energy firm.

She had been a member of the Camden County Human Relations Commission for the last five years, Major said.

Besides her husband, son, and daughter, Mrs. Waldo is survived by daughters Corinne Hale and Cara Tully, and five grandchildren.

A visitation was set from 2 to 4 p.m. Sunday, Oct. 12, at Kain-Murphy Funeral Services, 15 West End Ave., Haddonfield, with a Funeral Mass at 10 a.m. Monday, Oct. 13, at Old St. Joseph's Church, 321 Willings Alley, Philadelphia.

Donations may be sent to www.pflagphila.org.

Condolences may be offered to the family at http://kainmurphy.com.