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Corbett comeback? Oh, it's on!

Fighting the polls, perception and probing questions from statewide media, candidate Corbett needs to stay on message.

A smile’s good, Gov. Corbett, but staying on point is better. (Tom Gralish / Staff Photographer)
A smile’s good, Gov. Corbett, but staying on point is better. (Tom Gralish / Staff Photographer)Read more

DUE TO MY DEEP affection for competitive politics, and since I know how much Gov. Corbett values my advice, I offer guidance for his re-elect announcement tour, which starts today in Pittsburgh.

See, polls show any generic Democrat beating TC. That means the guv needs a run of positive coverage to appear viable in next year's race.

A big part of that means not getting knocked off his message, which in his case is "promises kept" on taxes, spending, on-time budgets, etc.

So if the guv faces a few dicey questions as he travels the state - including a stop at a Northeast Philly American Legion post tomorrow morning - here are ways to stay on message and deflate the lamebrain, left-wing, liberal-obsessed media.

For example, if asked about cutting $1 billion in education and killing Philly schools, the incumbent could say, "I kept my promise to clean up the deficit Ed Rendell left me. State spending on education is at an all-time high. And if the Philly School District had half my fiscal discipline, it wouldn't be in the mess it's in."

Pow!

Now let's look at other stuff Corbett could get in various media markets.

Governor, the attorney general is investigating your handling of the Penn State/Sandusky scandal. Doesn't the mere fact that an investigation is underway suggest you mishandled the case?

"When I was attorney general, I kept my promise and successfully prosecuted those who broke the law. I also kept my promise and defended all state laws whether they offended my personal politics or not."

Bam!

Governor, some say your voter-ID law could disenfranchise many poorer and older citizens and appears to be little more than a Republican tactic to hold down the vote in a state with more Democrats than Republicans. How do you respond?

"I promise that if and when voter ID is in effect in Pennsylvania, there will be adequate time and resources devoted to making sure all eligible voters can easily obtain ID to comply with the law. And, as you know, I keep my promises."

So, suck it, leftie!

Governor, the Inquirer recently reported your administration spent millions on outside counsel for, so far, losing efforts to change things you don't like. Isn't this a waste of taxpayer money?

"I promise you I've saved more taxpayer money than I've spent on lawyers. And, by the way, the Inquirer is lecturing me on spending money on outside lawyers? Really?"

Oh, snap!

Governor, your oft-cited job-creation numbers only count private-sector jobs, and although you keep saying you've created more jobs, every state has done so and almost every large state has created more jobs than Pennsylvania. Aren't your jobs claims disingenuous?

"I promised I would lead the state out of the tax-and-spend deficit my Democratic predecessor left me and I've done that because, as you know, I keep my promises."

I'm no Eddie!

Governor, your decision not to expand Medicaid under Obamacare puts an estimated 700,000 low-income uninsured Pennsylvanians at risk. Do you regret that decision?

"Well, I think we see how well Obamacare is working. I think we all see how well Washington is working. And I think we see that I work to keep my promises."

How yinz enjoying that website?

Governor, you've insulted the unemployed by suggesting they'd rather collect government benefits than work, or can't get jobs because they can't pass drug tests. You've insulted Latinos, saying you can't find any to work for you. You've insulted women, saying they should just close their eyes if required to get ultrasounds. And you've insulted gays by comparing same-sex marriage to incest.

"Let me stop you right there. Have you met my Airedales, Harry and Penny? If not, I promise you will. And I keep my promises."