DEAR ABBY: I'm a 32-year-old woman who is HIV-positive. My colleague - who is unaware of my status - recently introduced me to a relative of hers who is also lonely and looking for someone to settle down with. We "clicked" and seem to complement each other in every way, although we haven't had any sexual encounter.My fear is: How do I disclose my status without being rejected? He seems to have big plans for us, which include settling down and having kids in the future. Please help me get out of this dilemma.
- In a Spot in South Africa
DEAR IN A SPOT: Much depends upon the strength of this man's feelings for you. It is very important that you have a frank discussion with him before the relationship goes any further.
The fact that you are HIV-positive may be problematic, but it does not mean you cannot have a family together if you wish in the future. Medications and other medical interventions can help keep the virus from being transmitted to your children, and condoms can protect your partner.