Sideshow: J-Lo livid, snarly over Smart darts

Jennifer Lopez, 43, has threatened to sue Star Magazine and In Touch Weekly over reports that her young man, dancer Casper Smart, 25, was seen visiting a gay peep show in New York (Star) and that he was "caught [with an] exotic masseuse" at a massage parlor (In Touch).

So, was he supposed to be indulging in gay or straight extra-Lopez sexual activities? The mags seem confused. J-Lo's not confused. Just incensed. "These statements are false, malicious, and defamatory," her lawyers say in a letter, which demands that the publications retract their stories or they'll be hit with a lawsuit.

A Smart rep says he was visiting a tattoo parlor next door to a sex establishment.

So Taylor Swift, whose tempestuous thing with John Mayer reportedly scarred their respective souls, has moved on to an 18-year-old Kennedy, Conor Kennedy. ("She's awesome," Conor's aunt Rory Kennedy tells reporters.)

Now, John, 34, who already has scarred the souls of Jennifer Aniston and Jessica Simpson, has made his countermove: The "Your Body Is a Wonderland" singer is reportedly canoodling with Russell Brand's ex-wife (of, like, 5 minutes), Katy Perry. Us Weekly said the two have been seen "holding hands and cuddling" (so hot). London's Daily Mail has posted photos of them cruising Wednesday night in a car in Lalaland, while gossip blog JustJared.com says they spent that very night together at the booze-'n'-sex playground of the rich-'n'-famous, the Chateau Marmont.

Before we continue strummin' about Katy Perry's love life, let's consider a question of linguistic and sexual interest: Can one be "courted strongly"? What does strong courting, as opposed to soft courting, look like? That's what Katy, who reportedly is sharing (high-thread-count Egyptian cotton) sheets with John Mayer, says she wants. "I'm a woman who likes to be courted - strongly," she tells Elle. Asked if her disastrous marriage to Brit Russell Brand has turned her off marriage, Katy says, "Never say never. . . . I'll let love take the lead on that."

Katy Perry, whose consumer goods are gobbled up by girls the world over, isn't sure she's a role model for her fans. "I'm not going to be everything to everyone," she tells Elle. "I can't tell a person when it's time for them to have sex. Or if they should have a cigarette. . . . But I try to live my life with a lot of integrity, and, hopefully, that sends a message."

Jessica Biel, who is breathless in these final days leading up to her mega-wedding with Justin Timberlake (a very strong courter, we imagine), has revealed that, unlike normal American lil' girls, she didn't spend her every waking moment dreaming about her wedding. "I never dreamt about . . . what it would look like or what it would be," the 7th Heaven star, 30, tells USA Today. "Even now, I still just feel like, I don't even know when it will ever happen, because we're so busy." Is her heart really into assuming that awesome mantle, Mrs. JT?

"An extremely strong, intelligent, supportive person." That's tight-ab'd Liam Hemsworth's description of his fiancee, Miley Cyrus. But love doesn't seem to supply enough adrenaline for The Hunger Games star, who tells Men's Health he likes to stare death in the face on his surfboard. "The fear of dying? That's part of the fun of it," he says. "I've seen a shark before. You get the worst wipeouts when you're not expecting it."

TV titan Aaron Sorkin was grilled this week by journos about his HBO show The Newsroom, a paean to those halcyon days (which we're not sure ever existed) when TV news was intelligent, relevant, and opinionated. The show features Jeff Daniels as an anchor working hard to bring those times back. British actor Emily Mortimer plays Daniels' hardened-yet-idealistic producer. Variety says Sorkin bristled at the suggestion that his female characters, including Mortimer's, are too often portrayed as mistake-prone, empty-headed, and silly.

"I completely respect that opinion, but 100 percent disagree with it," said the West Wing maestro. "Females on the show are equals of the men. They are not just talked about as being good at their job, they are plainly good at their job."

Critics, Daniels noted, are awful naysayers who aren't happy unless they're attacking creative folks. "It took me a long time as an actor to stop reading you," he told the journos.

The Newsroom has been green-lighted for a second season, to air next June.

Variety says Spanish stunner Paz Vega, 36, has been signed to play the divine opera singer Maria Callas opposite Nicole Kidman's Princess Grace Kelly in Olivier Dahan's Grace of Monaco.

Eminem has racked up 60.1 million Facebook "likes," shattering Lady Gaga's record for being a living person with the most likes.

Celebrated film producer Harvey Weinstein's $35,800-per-head fund-raising dinner Monday for President Obama will feature a who's who of celebrities, says the New York Post, including Vogue editor Anna Wintour, Anne Hathaway, Aaron Sorkin, and Joanne Woodward.

Inquirer wire services. Contact "SideShow"