Sideshow: TMZ: Texts show Biebs is no pop

Mariah Laci Yeater, the California woman who claimed Justin Bieber was her baby Tristyn's father, made it all up. So says TMZ, which has obtained text messages sent by Yeater to a friend in which she identifies an ex-bf named Robbie as the father. The recipient of Yeater's text has asked TMZ to withhold his name.

In one text, Yeater promises that the friend will get a cut of the money she would wrangle out of Bieber. Justin Bieber's lawyer, Howard Weitzman, tells TMZ, "This information proves Mariah Yeater fabricated the story. Our independent investigation indicates Ms. Yeater never met Justin, she has consistently identified another man as the child's father, and Ms. Yeater and her coconspirators hatched this scheme in order to extort money" from Bieber.

Yeater this week dropped her paternity suit against Bieber, saying she wanted an out-of-court settlement with the 17-year-old megastar.

A group of Ryan Gosling fans have started a petition that claims Ryan was robbed of his rightful claim to the Nobel Prize of meaningless frivolity, People mag's Sexiest Man Alive. As of Thursday morning, it bore 1,652 signatures. Local hero Bradley Cooper won the honor.

Reports that Amy Winehouse had material for a third album at the time of her death weren't exaggerated, says the Associated Press, which has discovered that the British blues singer had written all the songs and had picked titles for them. "She had written down everything she wanted to do," says producer Salaam Remi.

Only two tracks were recorded and appear on a compilation album, Lioness: Hidden Treasures, due Dec. 6. Remi says Winehouse, 27, who died in July, was taking a break from the CD to cut another record with a jazz supergroup she planned to put together with ?uestlove of Philly's The Roots.

Most comics have so far kept their mitts off the Penn State-Jerry Sandusky child-sex-abuse scandal. Not so South Park creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone, who used Wednesday night's episode of the cartoon to lampoon the situation.

In one scene, a social worker comes upon a torture chamber in a foster home. "What am I ... a recruitment coach for Penn State?" he muses. In another, a social worker takes Kenny and a group of other kids from their abusive parents, promising to place them in nice foster homes. "You're going to be put in a foster home, so I need to know, would you like to go to Neverland Ranch, the Catholic Church, or Penn State University?" the social worker asks.

Too soon, too disturbing, too tasteless?

Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson are bummed that Twilight: Breaking Dawn - Part 1 director Bill Condon had to trim their sex scene and KStew's baby-birth scene so the movie could get a PG-13 rating. KStew has a painful labor scene outta heck delivering her creepy vampire baby.

"In the book, Bella is screaming, 'NOOOOO!'," KStew tells Entertainment Weekly, acting out a banshee yelp to illustrate her point. "And I did it like that - crazy and Exorcist-like. I was going for this weird mix of turning into the most feral mother you can imagine and also fighting for my own life. I mean, I was a nutcase. I was an absolute nutcase." And people wonder why I love this girl.

Movie mega-director James Cameron has unveiled a trailer for his 3-D reworking of his '97 mega-blockbuster mega-love mega-epic Titanic, starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet. It's mega-due in April.

Doctor Who muse Billie Piper, who took it all off again and again in Showtime's Secret Diary of a Call Girl, is putting it all back on - and then some - to play a dowdy security guard onstage, says London's Daily Mail. Billie, 29, who is expecting her second baby with hub Laurence Fox, is starring in a London production of man's man's playwright Neil LaBute's Reasons to Be Pretty.

Simon Cowell has gone a-Twitter, racking up 190,000 followers 12 hours after joining the site on Wednesday night, says British wire service UK Press Association. "It's official, I know it's taken a while," tweets @simoncoweIl. "It's really me! We're live in 10 minutes," he tweeted before Wednesday's episode of The X-Factor. Si didn't waste time in mocking his fellow talent-show judges, L.A. Reid, Nicole Scherzinger, and Paula Abdul. "I love being on twitter," he writes. "Thank you for allowing me to beat the other 3 in the popularity poll. Paula looked like she'd sucked on a lemon!" A Twitter poll of X-Factor viewers Wednesday night revealed Si as the favorite judge.

House star Olivia Wilde, 27, on Wednesday unveiled the famed Swarovski's Crystal Star that will top the gigantonormous Rockefeller Center Christmas tree this holiday season in New York. The star weighs 550 pounds, spans 9 feet, and is adorned with 25,000 Swarovski crystals. The tree goes up Nov. 30.

Friday Night Lights star Connie Britton has returned home to Tinseltown after adopting a baby boy, 9-month-old Eyob, from Ethiopia, says People.