Sideshow: Like mother, like daughter?

Fear 'n' trembling grips her dad: What will become of Lourdes Maria Ciccone Leon, 14, when she discovers boys? (Her mom, Madonna, for one, began using underwear as outerwear and sang of having hot, "like a virgin," sex.)

"I'm dreading it so much," Lourdes' pop, Carlos Leon, 44, tells People, "because she's my little girl. I want her to stay young forever." Leon, a personal trainer and sometime thesp (his new pic is Immigration Tango), admits he's "too lenient" with his girl: "I'm very empathetic, and I'm good at listening. . . . I'm probably a bad dad when it comes to disciplining her."

Leon says he's not bitter that his romance with Madge didn't last. (She has since gone on to date, let's say, a number of dudes.) "I'm forever grateful to [her]," says Leon. "I have no regrets. I wouldn't change anything. I got the best thing out of that relationship, and that's my daughter." That's so even though Lourdes routinely mocks him for wearing uncool outfits.

Clarence Clemons isn't ashamed to admit he's gaga for Lady Gaga. The 69-year-old E Street Band saxophone guru tells Rolling Stone he got the ultimate thrill three weeks ago, when Her GagaNess' people rang his Florida pad.

"They said to me, 'Lady Gaga wants you to play on her album,' " Clemons says.

"This is on a Friday afternoon at 4 p.m. I said, 'When do you want me to do it? I'm free Monday or Tuesday.' They go, 'No, she needs you right now in New York City.' "

Bruce Springsteen's ol' comrade arrived around midnight: "She came running down the hall. She was like, 'Big Man!' "

Clemons, who played on the tune "Hair," says, "it was wild. I was so excited. I'm a Gaga-ite."

Ashton Kutcher, 33, is (by all accounts) happily married to Demi Moore, 48. Yet, he really wants to go on a date with Jennifer Aniston. (Who isn't married, happily or otherwise.) Why? Because of a bet. Ashton, whose latest flick, No Strings Attached, is about sex of the, um, no-strings-attached variety, made a $1,000 bet with a pal when he was 17 that one day, he'd date Jen.

"Five years later, I actually met her," Ashton tells BBC's The Graham Norton Show, "and I asked Brad Pitt's permission to ask his [since divorced] wife out on a date. He was so cool and said, 'You go for it' so I asked her and she turned me down."

Adds Ashton, "Now we're friends so it might still happen."

Photogs have snapped Glee star Matthew Morrison, 32, making out with Perfect Couples' Olivia Munn, 30, at Sunday's Philadelphia Flyers-New York Rangers hockey game at Madison Square Garden. The Flyers won, 4-2. No information on which team the lovers support.

The Boulder Daily Camera says Oliver Stone was crowned "Master of Cinema" at the Boulder International Film Festival on Sunday. The master's pics have garnered 31 Academy Award nods, and he has won three Oscars. His recent films include Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps and the docu South of the Border

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Pseudo-celeb Jesse James, who delighted gossipers when his third marriage, to Sandra Bullock, disintegrated last year amid scandal of the most salacious kind, is writing his memoirs. I mean, he does have sooo much sleaze to document. American Outlaw is due out later this year from Simon & Schuster.

"It was by far the most pain I'd ever been in," heartthrob male stripper turned hunky star Channing Tatum, 30, tells USA Today. He's talking about the time he poured boiling water on his wetsuit to warm up on a cold day while shooting his Roman legion actioner The Eagle. "But there was no scarring or nerve damage."

Tatum's hip, though, is giving him trouble.

"I tore it up training," he says. "I feel like I'm falling apart. I'm going to have surgery to tweak some things." Tatum has suffered for his art. And there's a lot of it: He has five films opening this year, including 21 Jump Street and a sequel to the boys' doll adaptation, G.I. Joe.

Perpetual adolescents Trey Parker and Matt Stone, whose monster hit, South Park, has drawn the ire of interest groups from fundamentalist Christians to libertarian gays, say their very first Broadway musical, The Book of Mormon, will please lovers of religion and musical theater alike.

"We've had both Mormon stuff and musical stuff in our work for a long time," Parker, 41, tells USA Today.

"Growing up, I saw all the classics at our little community playhouse. I loved their optimism," he adds, "especially the older stuff, like Rodgers and Hammerstein."

Stone promises Mormon is "an uplifting show. I mean, [it] is a pro-faith musical. People may say, 'What?!' But that's what it's meant to be." Previews start Thursday.

English soccer heartthrob David Beckham is, indeed, one of the 1,800 lucky folks invited to the April 29 nuptials of Prince William, 28, and Kate Middleton, 29. Guess he'll bring wife, Posh Spice. Other reported guests will include the king of Bahrain, Hamed ibn Isa Khalifa (if he's not too busy managing pro-democracy protests) and Sir Elton John (if not too busy slagging off other celebs).

Even William's ex gfs Jecca Craig and Olivia Hunt and Middleton's former beau Rupert Finch are coming. So why not ask President Obama? It's not a full state occasion, Reuters explains. (Huh?)

Hayden Panettiere told Access Hollywood on Monday that she's surprised some people are outraged about her new TV flick, Lifetime's Amanda Knox: Murder on Trial in Italy, which sensationalizes a real-life '09 murder.

Hayden plays Amanda Knox, who has been sentenced to 26 years in prison after being found guilty of murdering her British roomie, Meredith Kercher, in Perugia, Italy. Knox's former beau Raffaele Sollecito also was convicted of the murder.

Knox's family is angry, calling the film an outright condemnation of Amanda.

"The way in which this film is done, it's done very tastefully. It's done in a very classy way," Hayden said. "There's nothing in it that would incriminate her, nothing that would sway opinions in court, when it came to her appeal."