Wednesday, July 23, 2014
Inquirer Daily News

Taylor Swift is totally writing songs about that One Direction kid already

Taylor Swift is reportedly single again. This means that tweenage girls with Twitter handles are probably definitely issuing crude blanket statements about Swift's theoretical sexual promiscuity.

Taylor Swift is totally writing songs about that One Direction kid already

Taylor Swift and Harry Styles: He´s so yesterday, joining the seeming legions of squeezes she has cozied up to - albeit briefly - and dumped.
Taylor Swift and Harry Styles: He's so yesterday, joining the seeming legions of squeezes she has cozied up to - albeit briefly - and dumped.

If you weren't invited to her Ben & Jerry's binge/Sex and the City marathon, you might not know that Taylor Swift is single again. That kid from One Direction (Harry Styles) supposedly broke up with Swift because she wasn't putting out enough.

As is typically the case, Swift's breakup means that tweenage girls with Twitter handles are probably definitely issuing crude blanket statements about Swift's theoretical sexual promiscuity.

It also means: BREAK UP ALBUM.

Yeah, Harry Styles better know what's coming to him because T-Swift fired a warning tweet across the bow on Thursday.

Like Kennedy, Mayer, Gyllenhaal, that Stephen guy, and the rest who came before him, Styles is set to be immortalized in a catchy/pithy/chart-topping single that will echo in every crevice of your brain until it's replaced by another catchy/pithy/chart-topping single about a boy. Reading should erect some sort of monument to the fallen commrades. Can't wait.

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