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Hugh Douglas enjoys Sharknado

    by Justin Klugh
    Published 

Hugh Douglas finally caught Sharknado over the weekend and not many film reviews have, historically, ended more positively.

Real talk. I wanna be in SharkNado 2.. I can act even worse than they did.. Who I need to see???

But hey, we've had a lot of fun tonight, but there is one lesson from this movie about a tornado made of sharks and hurls the sharks at people that's not funny:

Sharks!!!!!!!!! They bite .... For real

Thanks for watching.

ENOUGH WITH THE GREATNESS ALREADY

All right, 39-year-old Derek Jeter whom some of us may have suggested would never play again but then hit a home run on the literal first pitch he saw after returning to the lineup, we get it.  You know, you reach a point when all this "best guy ever" stuff just starts to get obnoxious.

Meanwhile, Yasiel Puig punched a hole in 0-0 tie with an 11th inning home run, bat flip, and slide into home plate that probably made Pedro Gomez spit out his coffee.

PACK IT IN

Boisterous wide receiver Greg Jennings signed with the Vikings this offseason after six years with the Packers, and has found himself unable to keep quiet about the horrible truth of his former quarterback, Aaron Rodgers:

"A lot of times when you have a guy who creates that spotlight for himself and establishes that and takes a lot of that, it becomes so-and-so and the team. It should always be the team."
--Greg Jennings

Yes, I'm sure it's clear even to fans that the wanton arrogance of Aaron Rodgers was tearing the Green Bay Packers locker room apart as they won the NFC North the last three years and the Super Bowl in 2010.

This weekend, Vikings coach Leslie Frazier decided it was time for everybody – meaning just Jennings, as Rodgers has done little more than shrug – to shut up.

If Jennings has that much of a problem with Rodgers – which he now suddenly says he doesn't – wait until he gets a load of the NFL's most notorious bad boy quarterback, Christian Ponder.

EVERYTHING'S COMIN' UP A-ROD

Things are looking up for Alex Rodriguez. He might not even be banned forever from baseball at this point. What a charmed life!

HE JUST CHOKED OUT THERE

Obviously, something isn't clicking for the Marlins' offense, so perhaps it can be traced back to their hitting coach, Tino Martinez.

Marlins owner Jeffrey Loria picked out Martinez himself, so you know he must be good. So strong was Loria's faith in Martinez that he even encouraged his hitting coach not to resign after a story surfaced about him verbally abusing and throttling players.

Just a little fooling around, baseball-style! Why, I can't remember a single little league game from my youth that didn't end with a good old fashioned choke-slam, just like Abner Doubleday intended.

So anyways, yeah, he's been fired for that.

"Coaching's tough," manager Mike Redmond explained.

IF ONLY THERE WAS A METAPHOR TO DRAW

Usain Bolt continued the tradition of showing up to races in very fast things; a tradition started with a Formula One racer, and then later maintained with what appears to be a souped-up version of the car from Monopoly.

Bolt went all out for the Anniversary Games this weekend at Olympic Stadium, and just rolled through in a rocket.