College football opens with myriad of tramplings

College football has opened, meaning that our NFL Sundays will be preceded by Saturdays with so many teams, rivalries, and Johnny Football's that you'll have to only pretend you know what's going on.

Assuming you survived the opening weekend! College football is full of both over stimulated lunatics and silly gimmicks, some of which are pulled off better than others.

We begin with Baylor fans, whose poor luck began during what appears to be a human stampede.

Be careful out there, folks. College football is fun, but it is not worth stomping on another person or becoming the unknowing victim of a vengeful horse.