From waffles to toast

OK, I'll admit it's hard not to like a nation whose main exports (from what I can gather) are fries, waffles, beer, and some more fries. But tomorrow afternoon at the World Cup in Brazil, it's time for the home of Waffle House, Old Milwaukee and greasy cheese fries to crush those Belgian impostors like a plate of their puffed-up, fru-fru so-called "waffles." I'm so pumped up for Team USA that I took tomorrow off to watch the big game! I'll see you Wednesday...before I disappear yet again for the long holiday weekend.

Please use the space below to explain -- hopefully in an 1,000 word comment, or (even better) more! -- why the IRS scandal or Benghazi or Fast and Furious or Obama's years in the madrasa are far worse than Watergate, or to reveal how I've been conspiring with my friends on the Journolist to keep all that out of the media by writing about fake issues, like the decline of the American middle class. I'm really looking forward to watching soccer and not reading those.

#IBelieveThatWeWillWin