That waddling sound you heard here this afternoon was a quick-in-and-out from America's second lamest duck, Vice President Dick Cheney, who snuck in with little fanfare for maybe the most empty photo-op since Ronald Reagan's handlers invented them. Apparently your federal rebate check comes from here in the Philadelphia area, a fact that hasn't sped the arrival of mine yet:
Those economic-stimulus checks are printed at only four plants in the country, and Vice President Cheney toured the one in Northeast Philadelphia today.
In a 10-minute speech to about 100 employees at the Philadelphia Regional Financial Center, Cheney called the checks "a shot of energy at the right time and in the right way."
"A shot of energy?" I'll say! Apparently Cheney and his entourage flew from D.C. to Willow Grove to deliver that 10-minute speech, wasting God knows how much pricey jet fuel in the process. And that wasn't the only "black gold" squandered in Cheney's hollow visit here.
He went on to say that the rebates "will help strengthen the case for permanent tax relief. ... In the months to come, the American people will once again prove why our economy remains the envy of the world."
The Cheney visit tied up midday traffic between the center and the Willow Grove Naval Air Station.
So, hundreds and maybe thousands of Philadelphia-area motorists idled in traffic so Cheney could come here for 10 minutes. With the price of gasoline these days, that probably ate up half of their $600 rebate check right there. Here's a crazy idea -- with America in the middle of its worst energy crisis in more than a generation, why don't Cheney and his boss do this for a photo op? WALK out to the Rose Garden and announce that you are curtailing all unnecessary trips between now and January -- and urge private citizens to do the same.
Because Dick Cheney only really needs to be on one more flight in his life, and that's a one-way ticket to the airport at Jackson Hole, Wyo.
Or Leavenworth, Kansas.
Blogger's note: Picture at top is from some other pointless Cheney trip.