Mom of 5 young ones just wants time alone

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have five kids, all under 6 years of age. The youngest are 7-month-old twins. A family in our church has offered to watch them so my husband and I can go out on a date. We haven't been alone together in a year.

I would like to accept their kind offer, but two things are holding me back. First, I don't think they realize the enormity of the task.

Second, I don't have anything to say to my husband. A date would be awkward and most likely consist of "relations." I like my husband, but I'd rather be left alone. What would you do?

- Frazzled Mom With No Support

DEAR FRAZZLED: Before placing your small children in the care of others, invite the family over to see exactly how much work would be involved in watching them. Then discuss with your husband what date night will entail and see if you can agree on what would be a fun night out.

You definitely need a break, and some alone time should be something to look forward to. That it isn't is of concern to me. It's possible you could benefit from marriage counseling to help re-establish a line of verbal communication. And, equally important, because you suspect the evening "might" result in relations, make sure you have birth control to prevent an accidental pregnancy.

DEAR ABBY: How do you politely tell friends and relatives who are guests in your home that your computer and TV are off-limits? Once they take control of the remote or the computer, they seem to go crazy and change all the settings to their preferences and never put the settings back when they leave! What can I do, Abby?

- Frustrated in Lewis Run, Pa.

DEAR FRUSTRATED: "Remind" any guest who uses your electronic equipment that it must be returned to your original settings before the person leaves your house. If you have already done that and it hasn't worked, then you must find the courage to say, "I'm not letting anyone use my computer or remote control because I have a hard time getting the settings back to where I put them after you leave."