TOO BAD jails are same-sex facilities or "Girls Gone Wild" founder

Joe Francis

might finally be able to make a "Women in Prison: Girls Gone Wild."

Otherwise the cry will go out, "Hey, Bubba, show us your man boobs!"

The bare-breasts mogul, according to TMZ.com and the County Press of Bay County, is in a Florida jail cell and may have a longer stay than anticipated. He has allegedly been found with contraband pills behind bars - and that could be a felony.

Drugs? Could he be Francis the Talking Mule?

How did Joe get caught? He allegedly tried to bribe a guard for a bottle of water with a $100 bill. The guard not only didn't take the bribe, he reported it, which led to a search, which led to the discovery of a number of unspecified pills, as well as $700 in cash.

Hey, a pack of smokes can run you a Benjamin in the joint.

Film Fest update

Looking to jump-start his filmmaking career in summer 2004, Steve Condon ventured into Delaware County's most notorious borough to make "The Borough," a documentary about Darby and its storied inhabitants.

"There are over 900 boroughs in Pennsylvania," Condon says in the introduction. "This is just one of them."

Hardly.

What Condon, a 1998 graduate of the Art Institute of Philadelphia, found, writes Daily News reporter William Bender, was a small town that's had a hard time drying out - from the floods, the drugs and the incessant political bickering that has hindered its revitalization.

But Condon and co-director Tommy Germanovich Jr. dug deeper, crafting an accurate portrayal not only of Darby's well-documented ailments, but its rich history and hopes of, someday, getting back on its feet.

On the final day of their 13-day shoot, they were besieged by one of the borough's infamous floods, making for an apt finale to the 60-minute film.

"The Borough" screens tomorrow at 7 p.m. at International House as part of the short-film program, "Soft Pretzels, Cheese-Steaks and Other Acts of God!"

* Tonight at the Ritz 5 (7 p.m.) ,

local author Irv Slifkin, whose new book is "Filmadelphia: A Celebration of a City's Movies" (pssst, it's this city's) will present the locally shot 1957 drama "The Burglar," starring Dan Duryea and Jayne Mansfield, with an appearance by the original voice of NFL Films, John Facenda.

Which one's the baby?

The National Enquirer reports that "Will & Grace" star Eric McCormack went ballistic on a recent Alaska Airlines flight from L.A. to Vancouver because plane personnel had toldhim the booster seat he brought on board for his son violated FAA regulations.

"Eric screeched like a banshee when he didn't get his way," said an anonymous insider. "He yelled at crew members, telling them his family had used the seat on many flights in the past.

"But the price tag was still on it. And when an attendant turned over the seat, a warning label said, 'Not to be used on aircraft!' "

Busted.

A McCormack rep told the Enquirer: "The McCormacks followed the regulations with very little fuss, but still believe their son would be safer in his car seat."

Tattbits

* "Extra" says the newborn

daughter of Scary Spice (aka Melanie Brown) has Eddie Murphy down as the daddy on her birth certificate.

Murphy has denied it.

Howard K. Stern?

Prince Frederic von Anhalt?

It's time for one of you to step up and make this right.

* Eddie Murphy is definitely not

the father of Julie Bowen's baby.

The "Boston Legal" star gave birth to a boy, Oliver McLanahan Phillips (we think you're going to be a lawyer, son) her rep, Geoffrey Ashley, said Wednesday.

Bowen, who is married to Scott Phillips, had worked through her pregnancy, and her water broke Tuesday while she was filming a scene.

"Everyone's fine. Everyone's healthy," Ashley said of Bowen and baby, who weighed 6 pounds, 15 ounces and measured 19 inches.

About the on-set surprise, star William Shatner told "Extra," "Her little muscles contracted . . . until the scene was over . . . and bang! . . . talk about method-acting.

"Her water broke . . . I followed the trail for as long as I could . . . and then I lost it."

* The "Jeopardy!" 2007 College

Championship will again have a local flavor when it tapes at USC on April 21-22.

Among the contestants are Anna Han, of Allentown and Penn State; Will Schultz, of Camden and the University of North Carolina, and Kaitlin Welborn, who hails from Tampa but attends Penn.

The grand-prize winner gets $100,000. The shows will air from April 30 through May 11.

* In discussing the Imus fiasco

on his WIP radio show yesterday, Howard Eskin made a point about the word "Ho."

In the African-American community, Eskin said, it's "almost like a term of endearment."

Yeah, if you're a pimp. *

Daily News wire services and Daily News sportswriter John Smallwood contributed to this report.