Welcome to New York, the worst seat in the house

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NEW YORK - Many of you seem to enjoy getting an inside look at how the media covers a big event like a World Series.

Allow me to offer a glimpse into last night's glamorous Game 1 experience.

Rode to stadium with six Inquirer colleagues and a cooler packed with our postgame meal - or, more simply put, with six turkeys and seven turkey sandwiches.

Four hours before Game 1, the main press box resembled the Tokyo subway. Bodies and computers made things impassable. The adjoining work rooms were overflowing too, the precious spots apparently having been claimed at dawn by savvy veteran journalists.

The poor Yankees. How were they know people would be interested in covering a World Series? Having hosted 39 others, there was no way they could possibly have anticipated a crowd.

Beat a hasty retreat for the auxiliary press box, a lofty, outfield perch where Philadelphia sportswriters were assigned seats and sherpas to get them there.

After rappelling up there, it was quickly apparent that more clothing, binoculars and oxygen would be required. The freezing wind howled like a New York cabbie. The puddles of water that two days of rain had left on our chairs and tables were icing over.

We all would have huddled near the TV monitors for warmth had there been any TV monitors. Apparently it was OK for the cream of the nation's sportswriters to get wet but not for TVs.

Far below, set up atop the right-centerfield wall, we could see a pair of NYPD snipers. Had New Yorkers finally tired of the Yankees uber-obnoxious broadcast team of John Sterling and Susan Waldman?

By game time, the rain and cold climate brought to mind Nome or a Rockies game in October.

On the field below, we could see Yanks starter CC Sabathia - the only human large enough to be visible - ambling toward the bullpen for warm-ups.

Even up here, in the section formerly known as Pluto, the ground shook.

 

Let's play nice

Seems like this I-95 World Series has precipitated a lot of ugly sniping between the more sophomoric elements in New York and Philadelphia.

Now here at Touch 'em All we generally abstain from such tomfoolery, preferring whenever possible to take the journalistic high road.

A few points, however, must be made:

1. How could a newspaper in New York, a city that fancies itself as sophisticated and cosmopolitan, put a doctored photo of a Phillies player in a skirt on its front page?

What's that you say? The paper is owned by Rupert Murdoch.

Never mind.

2. Philly's tabloid, the Daily News, would never stoop so low as to run a doctored photo of an opposing player in women's clothing.

Of course, if it wanted to, it could probably find an undoctored one of Alex Rodriquez in heels.

3. Speaking of A-Rod, since when is Kate Hudson a big celebrity?

Oh, I forgot, New Yorkers also consider Regis Philbin a big celebrity.

4. When New Yorkers brag about New York, they're actually talking about Manhattan, a place where none of them live.

They all reside further from the Statue of Liberty than Philadelphians, residing like gerbils in grimy, overpriced hovels in the outer boroughs or, worse yet, Long Island.

 

History across the river

If you get to a game at the new Yankee Stadium, bring your own ATM machine, make sure you're seated someplace where the altitude approximates earth's and take a moment to glance across the Harlem River.

What you'll see there is a cluster of ugly buildings on a bluff, structures so bland they appear to have been designed by a particularly unimaginative East German.

Those buildings occupy the site of the old Polo Grounds. For those too young to remember, that's where Christy Mathewson pitched, where John McGraw managed, where Willie Mays made his famous catch, and where Bobby Thomson hit the "Shot Heard Round the World."

More important for Phillies fans, it's where Philadelphia beat New York not once but twice in a World Series.

In 1911, Connie Mack's A's beat McGraw's Giants in six games, Frank Baker earned the nickname "Home Run," and all the sportswriters fit in the press box. They won in 1913, too.

 

Game 1 Limerick

New York fans, they think they're above it.

They're smug and they're rude and they love it.

So how 'bout if Philly.

Knocks their Yankees silly.

Then like Tug we can tell 'em to shove it.

 

5 things overheard pregame

1. "I can't believe I'm standing here in Yankee Stadium for Game 1 of the World Series. I've got my hat, my program, my $10 beer."

2. "Brrrrr!"

3. "What's the big deal? It's steak and you add cheese."

4. One Yankee fan to another: "The Phillies have never beaten the Yanks."

"They beat them twice this year."

"That don't count."

5. "Hey, a Bud Light is only 220 calories. Time to start my diet."

 

5 things not overheard pregame

1. "No, please, I insist you go before me."

2. "Wish I were sitting up there in the auxiliary press box."

3. "Yes, I can spell Teixeira."

4. "That three-piece oom-pah-pah band on the main concourse really rocks."

5. "Now this is baseball weather."

 

New Yankee Stadium observations

Among its best features are all the photos from Yankees history. There's one from 1927 in which Babe Ruth is looming over diminutive manager Miller Huggins. Kind of reminds you of Andy Reid and Joe Banner.

I'm only basing this on appearances, but I'm pretty sure Joba Chamberlain is not a Rhodes Scholar. And that hat certainly doesn't help alter the impression.

Several Yankees employees walk around the concourse holding signs that say "How may I help you?" It's all for show. They were unable to get me a seat in the main press box.

In another photo, this one in the food court, a young boy is handing a glass of milk to Ruth. Had there been a caption, it undoubtedly would have said, "Where's my beer chaser?"

How come in the midst of the worst recession in decades, there were lines to get into the Yankees Team Store, where hats went for $65 and uniform tops $300, and to get into NYY, a restaurant where the King crab legs go for $54.75?

 


Contact staff writer Frank Fitzpatrick at 215-854-5068 or ffitzpatrick@phillynews.com.

 

 

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24
Comments   
Posted 10:02 PM, 10/28/2009
elhirsch
Stop the video!!!!!!
Posted 10:31 PM, 10/28/2009
mrsmax
Good job, much better than that New York Post Frillies story
Posted 11:08 PM, 10/28/2009
AreaMan
I usually love to lay into Frank. But great column today, and the line about A-Rod was great.
Posted 11:09 PM, 10/28/2009
fla
Suprisingly good stuff Frank. Keep it up.
Posted 11:48 PM, 10/28/2009
Victor_Yuschenko
Yes - stop the video. Please.
Posted 11:51 PM, 10/28/2009
echosmyron
This was funny. Bring more of this throughout the series.
Posted 11:51 PM, 10/28/2009
everydayguy
The "5 Things Overheard/Not Overheard" is always the best part of Frank's articles. Love them.
Posted 11:56 PM, 10/28/2009
ACBaughman
That was fun. Do it again tomorrow.
Posted 12:10 AM, 10/29/2009
chief_jaysons
I'm a huge Philly fan, but can we not stoop to the silly level the NYC papers have stooped to? I live in NYC, and my advice to all Phillies fans is to save the trash talkin until the series is over.
Posted 12:10 AM, 10/29/2009
BlairW
Enjoyable. Limericks for every game!
Posted 12:14 AM, 10/29/2009
realdm
Agreed, Frank's articles are usually awful. This was suprisingly informative and dare I say entertaining. He needs to get out into the the field more often, perhaps.
Posted 01:21 AM, 10/29/2009
furio
Something I don't say often but tonight it is deserved, Frank nice article
Posted 01:52 AM, 10/29/2009
NoPulitzer4U
I'm not gonna lie to you like these other readers: this actually isn't very well-written. It could be a lot better. But I also think you show promise. With some luck you might be able to get a job at the NY Post next year covering the Mets! Good luck, Frank!
Posted 02:38 AM, 10/29/2009
bigeastbeast
Tug actually said:"Stick it".I have the tape of the ceremony at JFK,perhaps the only one in existence. The prices in those stores can be afforded only by those Yankee"fans" who drain the taxpayers'blood working for companies which were bailed out.
Posted 09:44 AM, 10/29/2009
COskier
You rappel down, not up. You'd think a writer would know this.
Posted 10:42 AM, 10/29/2009
garyshaffer
Sabathia was pitching hurt, and here's what this reporter uncovered: A beer guzzling pitcher named CC, Had paused between innings to PP, But sadly he found, when returned to the mound, That his zipper was pinching his wee, wee.
Posted 01:13 PM, 10/29/2009
xi_lives
The difference between Fitzpatrick and Rupert Murdoch employees is that in less than a month Rupert Murdoch's employees will still have jobs.
Posted 01:33 PM, 10/29/2009
thebigrocketboy
If you feel it's important for the multimedia on this page to autostart, at least incorporate a session variable (or even a cookie) to disable the autostart for subsequent page visits. There is absolutely no reason why a user should have to deal with the multimedia over and over again. This needs to be fixed ASAP.
Posted 02:03 PM, 10/29/2009
slvr_gry
If this is your idea of journalism, you're lucky you got into any press box.
Posted 02:21 PM, 10/29/2009
knebman
After seeing her in person, I really wanna go down on that chick who was nabbed by the overzealous and under-challenged Bensalem police department.
Posted 04:38 PM, 10/29/2009
LennyFishcake
"The freezing wind howled like a New York cabbie." Awful writing.
Posted 08:25 AM, 10/30/2009
annec
love it
Posted 11:52 AM, 10/30/2009
krakatoa
that's what I was gonna say, COskier, rapelling is the act of rapidly descending a mountain by rope, going up is called "climbing". Yeah you sportwriters have it so tough, free passes to every game, talking to all the stars...jeez talk about ungrateful.
Posted 01:29 PM, 10/30/2009
joe$
It's Suzyn. Her parents couldn't spell either. And they managed to raise a Yankee fan in Boston. Which explains why she is so horrible. Poor parenting.
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