These days, though, the ticket and concession prices and the fancy-schmancy ballparks and the orange-alert level of security around the Grapefruit and Cactus leagues lend an aura of artificial importance to these glorified intrasquad games.

So it's not surprising that the fans are confused when they show up and the regulars don't play after the third inning, or the visiting team brings only two players they've ever heard of.

Nor was it shocking that the Yankees and Tampa Bay Rays had a little misunderstanding about the rules of engagement at this time of year.

To recap: Saturday, Rays runner Elliott Johnson plowed into Yankees catcher Francisco Cervelli, breaking Cervelli's wrist.

Yankees manager Joe Girardi, while conceding Johnson's slide was clean, was still furious. He wasn't upset with the play. He was angry because the calendar said March.

"I'm all for playing hard, but I don't think it's time to run over a catcher in spring training," he said. "During the season, I'm all for it . . . But in spring training, I don't believe in it."

What Girardi apparently does believe in during spring training is revenge. When the teams met again on Wednesday, Yankees starter Heath Phillips hit Rays third baseman Evan Longoria with a pitch in the first inning. In the second inning, Yankees first baseman Shelley Duncan went into second base spikes high, gashing Akinori Iwamura and igniting a bench-clearing brawl in the process.

The vote here (and all the delegates who go with it) is cast for Tampa Bay.

Look, it's not that complicated.

Clean, hard plays during spring training: good.

Dirty plays with an intent to injure during spring training, or any other time for that matter: bad.

And if Girardi is already so tightly wound in his first spring that he's overreacting to incidents like this, how will he handle being in the pressure cooker that managing the Yankees is once things really start to heat up?

Crystal clear

George Lopez: "Yes, I would consider it. I can't hit or throw, but [White Sox manager] Ozzie Guillen and I would be a perfect fit. I know all the bad words in Spanish."

George Wendt (Norm on "Cheers"): "I could get on base . . . My belly would be so far over the plate they'd either have to walk me or hit me."

Comedian and Cubs fan Tom Dreesen had a suggestion for his favorite team: "They should charge rich and famous people the same way NASA charged that rich guy to go into space. Then use that money to buy better pitching."

Numerology

baseballs with them to China

for a two-game exhibition series against the Dodgers. "I don't want to run out," equipment manager Brian Prilaman explained. "I don't think they'll have [a sporting goods store] down the street in Beijing."

* Braves lefthander Mike

Hampton is trying to come back after missing the last two seasons because of injuries. The Atlanta Journal-Constitution reports that, according to the Elias Sports Bureau, the last pitcher to return from that long an absence and win at least 10 games was Schoolboy Rowe in 1946. He was 11-4 for the Phillies after missing two seasons while in the Navy during World War II.

Quotehanger

Martinez, on the whereabouts of his Red Sox 2004 World Series ring: "I keep it in a safety-deposit box in New York. With my skinny, ugly fingers, I can't wear that big thing."

* Atlanta outfielder Jordan

Schafer, the Braves' top prospect, on being considered cocky: "It's a really fine line. You can't be a punk and make people think, 'He's young and hasn't proven himself.' At the same time, you have to be confident in your ability. If you doubt yourself, you're not going to play very well."

Box score line of the week

His one out came on a sacrifice fly.

In other words, he retired only one batter and even that resulted in a run.

Rumor control central

(hernia) out for at least the first month of the season, the New York Daily News reports that the Mets are looking at Pittsburgh's Xavier Nady and Detroit's Marcus Thames.

* The two leading contenders to take Brandon Inge off the Tigers' hands seem to be the Dodgers and Giants, although both teams would expect Detroit to pick up much of the remaining $19.1 million Inge is owed over the next 3 years.

Et cetera

formidable lineup. But Joel Zumaya will be out until midseason following shoulder surgery, Todd Jones has a 24.55 earned run average and is saying things like, "I've got to figure it out," and Fernando Rodney won't be ready until Opening Day. That's the closer and two primary setup relievers.

* The Cubs granted filmmaker

John Scheinfeld permission to make a behind-the-scenes documentary on this season. "If we win the World Series this year [ending a 100-year drought], it'll probably win an Oscar," second baseman Mark DeRosa said. "I'll get to walk on the red carpet. We're going to Sundance!"

* Twins reliever Pat Neshek

was dominant early last season, but had a 4.83 earned run average in the second half. He thinks the fade might have been caused by an unhealthy lifetsyle, so he's become a vegan. *

Send email to hagenp@phillynews.com.