Sidney Crosby walks into the DMV, passes the line, and goes on his way. Meanwhile, the people there before him continue their thrilling afternoon roped into a single file line.
What happened in between? Some have the audacity to suggest Crosby received special treatment, and was escorted to the front of the line, past people who'd been waiting up to 90 minutes.
But the Penguins CEO David Morehouse has stepped in to denounce these awful, awful rumors about his star player.
"Anyone that knows Sid or follows hockey -- in Pittsburgh or anywhere -- knows that's not the person he is. To think he would flaunt his status and cut in line -- that's not him."
Yes, it's very much unlike Sidney Crosby to find himself on the receiving end of good fortune due to his status as the face of the NHL.
We'll never know what happened in that DMV; whether Crosby did indeed get preferential treatment; or threatened to start punching people in the back of the head; or simply cried or threw himself to the ground until he got what he wanted. Whatever happened, you better believe he'll be responding with a shocked sense of indgination, as if the concept is preposterous.
"Crosby told the newspaper in an email the original report was exaggerated and he saw 'no need to make a big deal about it.'"
But we do know that the DMV now has one distinct blessing: Sidney Crosby is no longer there.