Matt Walsh, Roger Goodell and the Patriots: They're all lying, at best, disingenuous, at least.

Walsh, the Brian McNamee of the NFL, yesterday slunk into the offices of two men with better things to do in an effort to squash Spygate and its most insidious development: that the Pats taped a Rams walkthrough before they beat the Rams in Super Bowl XXXVI in 2002.

Walsh was armed with evidence he never should have had after his stint as a low-level Patriots video gofer and scout - illegal, grainy videotapes he took of opponents flashing signals during games.

Why did he keep the tapes? As résumé material, Walsh said, according to Roger Goodell, NFL commissioner, who yesterday interviewed Walsh for more than 3 hours in his New York offices.

Résumé material?

Riiight.

Because, of course, most prospective employers want to see how well you'll cheat for them - and they'll be delighted that you retain the damning evidence of their cheating:

"No, don't bother shredding those transcripts from our meeting with the EPA, Matty. Take 'em home. Lock 'em up. You never know when you'll be on an interview and need proof of your loyalty!"

Goodell clearly wasn't buying that one.

"He just said he may one day need something for his résumé to indicate the types of things he did when he was a Patriots employee. So he kept them as evidence of the work that he did," Goodell said, and kept the smirk off his face when he added: "That was the answer he gave me."

At least McNamee admitted that he kept a stash of syringes and vials as insurance because he didn't trust Roger Clemens, whom McNamee claims to have injected with steroids and human growth hormone.

Walsh also insisted the Patriots never used the tapes during games; that the tapes were meant to help prepare for divisional opponents the Pats would face later in the season. That's important, because supergenius Pats coach Bill Belichick's defense in the matter was he misunderstood the rule: That recording signals was allowed if they weren't used during that game.

Riiight.

Except that Walsh yesterday said he was told by his employers to not get caught taping anything - particularly incriminating for Belichick . . . not that Goodell needed more ammo against the Hoodie:

"I didn't accept Bill Belichick's explanation for what happened, and I still don't to this day."

As such, he fined Belichick a half-million dollars, fined the Patriots a quarter-mil and docked the club a first-round pick in the recent draft.

Furthermore, three of the eight tapes Walsh turned over to the league were of opponents the Pats would not face again that season - not of divisional foes. Suddenly, the credibility of this anonymous, grandstanding, low-level fame-seeker comes into serious question.

OK, it always was in serious question. Goodell, when asked whether he believed Walsh, at least implicitly acknowledged that:

"The fundamental information that was provided today was consistent with what we knew last September."

Speaking of fundamental information . . .

The supposedly straight-talking NFL commissioner yesterday used a crooked tongue when he tried to take credit for catching the Patriots cheating. Pressed, Goodell acknowledged that the NFL was alerted to the cheating by the Jets while the Jets played the Pats during a game in the season's opening week.

And then there is the continued arrogance and audacity of the Patriots, which, incredibly, exceeded that for which they are already despised.

They yesterday issued an outrageous statement that trumpeted their self-perceived vindication with regard to taping the walkthrough.

Hold it.

First, Walsh only said he didn't tape it, and he didn't know of it being taped - not that such a tape never existed.

Second, Walsh did admit to being on the field with other Pats personnel during the Rams' walkthrough, his presence permitted by the NFL, ostensibly to adjust on-field technological equipment that would be used on game day. Walsh yesterday told Goodell that, when asked, he told Pats coaches that he noticed the Rams employing a certain formation and a certain special-teams personnel package.

So, yes, they cheated. They weren't there to scout. They were there to adjust equipment.

So much for righteous indignation.

Hey: Shame on the NFL for letting anybody from New England watch the Rams' practice, be it Walsh or Ted Kennedy. And shame on the Rams for not evicting Walsh and Co., who apparently wore team gear while they fiddled with their knobs and wires.

But supershame on the Patriots for not just shutting up, polishing their three Lombardi Trophies and thanking Roger Goodell for not taking them back and instead giving them to the Rams, Panthers and Eagles. *

Send e-ma*l to hayesm@ph*llynews.com.