Stephen A. Smith: Wanted: Coach who wants Sixers

The 76ers are good at revealing names, particularly the ones that should not really matter.

They'll tell you they've talked to Avery Johnson about being their next coach one minute, then Doug Collins the next. Sam Mitchell is on their list as well as Portland assistant Monty Williams. What the Sixers won't tell anyone is perhaps the most important thing of all: that they are everyone's fallback plan and nothing more. This is what happens when the job as Philadelphia's next coach is as attractive as walking through a rat-infested sewer.

This job is something any reputable coach would bypass without a second thought, which may speak more about the state of affairs in Sixerland than all those empty seats we saw in the Wachovia Center over 41 nights this season.

There's no need to bother talking to the Sixers right now unless, of course, you're interested in hearing the same old rhetoric we've been hearing for weeks.

Ed Stefanski will tell you, "The search is still on. . . . It's going to take some time." But we're still wondering how much time remains for him as the team's general manager. Peter Luukko, Comcast-Spectacor's chief operating officer, will sound a bit more formal in echoing those thoughts - oblivious, it seems, to the appearance of leaving his GM hanging out to dry.

And don't expect to hear anything from chairman Ed Snider at all, either because Stefanski and Luukko are both speaking for him or because Snider is too busy watching the NHL playoffs right now.

Shhh. The Flyers are still playing. Haven't you heard? Pity the fool brave enough to interrupt Chairman Snider during this time of year.

The thing is, fools abound these days, especially when it comes to unemployed NBA coaches looking to get back into the fraternity. If they're not talking basketball as broadcast analysts, they are lamenting their absence from the coaching ranks. And that provokes them to mislead franchises into thinking they desire jobs that are, well, undesirable.

This is where the Sixers come in.

It is a team that has no point guard, a team stuck with Elton Brand and the three years (and $51 million) left on his deal. It is a team obligated to dole out another $55 million to a star (Andre Iguodala) who can only be described as solid and athletic but with no box office appeal. And the center, Samuel Dalembert, doesn't want to stay in Philadelphia.

It gets worse for the Sixers. All the NBA's other coaching vacancies - the L.A. Clippers, New Jersey, New Orleans, Chicago, and Atlanta (since Mike Woodson will be dismissed once Orlando obliterates the Hawks in their second-round series) - are more attractive than the Sixers' job.

The Clippers have Blake Griffin and Eric Gordon, plus $17.5 million in salary-cap room this summer. The Nets have potential all-stars at point guard (Devin Harris) and center (Brook Lopez), plus about $26 million in cap space this summer, making a 12-win team last season more appealing that your homies off Broad and Paterson.

The Chicago Bulls have point guard extraordinaire Derrick Rose, forward Joakim Noah and about $20 million in cap space. New Orleans has Chris Paul, who is better than the entire Sixers franchise. And the Hawks have a young nucleus with playoff experience over the last two seasons.

"Of all the jobs available right now, the Sixers are clearly the least attractive of them all," one Eastern Conference executive said Wednesday. "That doesn't mean they won't get somebody. It just means the likelihood is that Philly won't be the next coach's first choice."

How comforting.

Everyone in the league knows Johnson, with all that he accomplished in Dallas, would prefer to coach in New Orleans or Atlanta. No matter how much we love and respect Collins, he was burned out in both Detroit and Washington, and he hasn't gotten any younger.

Mitchell, the former Raptors coach, is smart enough to know he needs a point guard if he's going to succeed. Ditto for Dallas Mavericks assistant Dwane Casey.

Which means that all the Sixers - still on the hook to former coach Eddie Jordan for $6 million over two years - have left is going the young, cheap route, someone who'll love and embrace this city and the challenge.

Hello, Doug Overton (the former La Salle player and Nets assistant). How are you?