Commentary: Trust is an essential element of great leadership

News stories and daily conversations about political campaigns, bank practices, and community relations frequently reference trust and its variations, trustworthy and trustworthiness. Trust is a requisite for a free, democratic society.

Defined as the extent to which we are willing to believe and act on the words, actions, or decisions of another, trust is the basis of all relationships. It is an essential element of leadership in business, government, schools, communities, and even our homes.

Trust must be earned. It should not be taken for granted, and it is not automatic based on position or power. Trust can't be built overnight, but it can be destroyed in a moment through broken promises, misrepresentation, deception, and falsehoods. Trustworthiness should be the foundation from which all true leaders operate.

Although trust is generally regarded as positive, it has a dark side as well. Too much trust or blind trust can leave us vulnerable and open to disappointment, betrayal, and abuse. If in doubt, just ask the victims of Bernie Madoff or Jerry Sandusky.

How do we build trust? How do we become trustworthy? How do we assess the trustworthiness of another? When deciding whether or not to trust someone, we need to consider three basic character traits: credibility, responsibility, and civility. While unarguably nebulous and subjective, these terms become more concrete when we can cite specific observable behavior that illustrates or supports them.

Let's start with credibility. The adage "actions speak louder than words" still holds true. Studies show that we believe what we see more than what we hear. We can learn a lot about people by watching how they interact with and treat others. We trust people who do what they say they are going to do. We are also more likely to trust people who have nothing to hide, and are straightforward and free from pretense or deceit.

We trust people who take responsibility for their words and deeds. Trustworthy people admit mistakes, don't shift blame, and are willing to be held accountable for their decisions and actions. They are acutely self-aware and self-controlled. Not only are they in touch with their emotions, they resist impulsive behavior and don't let their feelings rule them.

For some, the word civility may seem stuffy and archaic, maybe even conjuring up 19th-century images of proper etiquette and overly polite conversation. Others regard it as an affront to free speech, an attempt to prevent people from speaking their minds for fear they might hurt someone's feelings. Civility is much more than good manners and political correctness. We should trust people who treat and talk about others with dignity and respect regardless of background or viewpoint. We trust people with whom we can express different opinions and ideas without fear of being bullied, belittled, or berated.

Almost 30 years ago, President Ronald Reagan said, "Trust, but verify." Some say Reagan's borrowed Russian proverb doesn't work anymore. Others say it never did because it's an oxymoron - if you have to verify, there is no trust.

Philosophical arguments aside, lack of trust will doom any relationship - whether business, political, or personal.

To maintain a sense of trust, we must verify from time to time that the trust we place in others is deserved based on demonstrated past and current behavior. Conversely, we need to make clear by our actions that we are trustworthy. As Stephen Covey put it, "If you want to be trusted, be trustworthy."

Have your politicians, bosses, community leaders, family, and friends earned your trust? Have you earned theirs?

Think carefully about the trust factor before you cast your vote, buy a product, invest your money, or even send an email. Trust that is warranted not only contributes to a free society, it is necessary to sustain it.

Karen Lawson is president of Lawson Consulting Group in Lansdale. KLawson@LawsonCG.com