If Hillary wins, what will we call Bill?
Susan Perloff is a writer and editor in Philadelphia After you help elect Hillary Clinton the first female president of the United States of America, you can worry about what to call her husband. Whatever it is, he will handle it.
Susan Perloff is a writer and editor in Philadelphia
After you help elect Hillary Clinton the first female president of the United States of America, you can worry about what to call her husband. Whatever it is, he will handle it.
Decades ago, I fell in love with a man who skis. He made me ski. In self-defense, I started writing about skiing. When I joined the ski writers' association (who knew?) and we went to our first meeting, all the members wore blue badges that said "Ski Writer." The group was disproportionately male, so most women wore no badge.
"Captain" Ed complained that no one talked to him, even though he knew far more about skiing than I ever did. Before the next event, I bought him a tag that read "Ski Writer's Husband." That did the trick, and two other husbands rapidly imitated us.
If I were president, my husband would be satisfied with just "Husband" for a title. But I wondered what other men would want if their wives made it to the White House. So I called a few friends, sent out emails, and wrote to an online group of editors and writers everywhere. Here are the best results.
Allan Johnson, an independent voter in Cherry Hill, would like First Fella as his title if his wife, Linda, became president.
Nate Hoffelder, of Dale City, Va., would like to be called Batman. "That works in most situations, actually."
"First partner," suggests an anonymous man from Monona, Wis. "I like this term because, as Michelle Obama has shown, the spouse can be a political partner," he writes. "Also, the partnership precedes the position. I worked with my ex-wife in several situations where I was either formally second-in-command to her or informally served as her right hand. She had a title. Whether I had one or not, I was her partner. I have no party affiliation. I've generally voted for Democrats, but also for some Republicans and independents."
A friend whom I refuse to name says that Mr. Clinton probably thinks, "Just don't call me late for dinner."
Christy Goldfinch, a Democrat from Fort Worth, Texas, says, "My husband says he would be happy to follow Bill Clinton as First Lady's Man."
Not married, Laurel Marshfield, a former Philadelphian and now of Rehoboth Beach, Del., asked her two male cats. "I think they said, 'Call him First Gentleman (FGOTUS) because a woman is always called First Lady (FLOTUS).' As an alternative, you might consider 'The Cat's Pajamas.' "
Jabar Whittier, an independent Center City voter, agrees with the cats.
A registered Democratic voter suggests: "Though it's traditional, labeling someone First seems less than democratic or egalitarian. So perhaps it's time to do away with Firsts and come up with another system of identification entirely."
From St. Paul, Minn., Katie Spielberger writes: "If my partner (wife-to-be) were president, I think I'd like to be called First Gentleperson." Spielberger keeps her party affiliation private because she does nonpartisan work for the Minnesota legislature.
Robert Glazer of Wynnewood and Philip NoLastName of Northeast Philly, both registered Democrats, prefer the term "First Man."
And William Harris, a Brooklyn Democrat, goes back to prefeminist phraseology when he says: "My wife, Jo Anne Simon, is a New York state assemblywoman. She's 15 years younger than I am. If she were president, I'd like to be the 'Chief Cook and Bottle Washer,' which I pretty much already am. She's a terrible cook."
So, Mr. Clinton, whaddya say?