Helping kids face deep loss

Karen and Jamie Moyer

are cofounders and vice presidents of the Moyer Foundation

Fort Hood; Malaysian Airlines Flight 370; Typhoon Haiyan; Aurora, Colo.; Newtown, Conn. The headlines talk of a world beset by tragedy, and such stories bring us face-to-face with grief on a grand scale. In the aftermath, we are reminded of how difficult it can be to confront the death of someone we love.

Coping with grief can be especially tough for children. According to the U.S. Census Bureau, about 1.5 million children lose a parent each year, and countless others experience the death of a relative, friend, or someone else close to them.

Children often feel isolated in their grief but rarely receive formal counseling. Data indicate that bereaved children are at a much greater risk for depression, suicide, poverty, and substance abuse. Indeed, the only thing worse than a grieving child is a child grieving alone, yet it happens all too often.

To help these kids, the Moyer Foundation started Camp Erin, a free, overnight camp designed for youths ages 6 to 17 affected by the death of someone close to them. Since the first camp opened in 2002, the foundation has expanded to 43 locations that serve more than 2,500 children annually across the country. There is a camp in every Major League Baseball city, including one in the Philadelphia area, which has served more than a thousand children from Bucks, Montgomery, Delaware, and Chester Counties.

During 12 years of witnessing the healing that happens at camp, we have realized that these children are offering us a profound insight about how to cope with grief.

On Monday, a new documentary featuring Camp Erin will debut on HBO. Many themes emanate from this moving film, One Last Hug: Three Days at Grief Camp, but one above all stands out: There is no substitute for the healing power of friendship. Grief is rooted in love, and sharing such sadness with someone who understands is a key to finding hope.

Opening up about grief and loss isn't easy. Perhaps it is the bravery of the children in this film that is so inspiring - and so enlightening. Time and again, we have been humbled to see kids at Camp Erin speak honestly about their pain - the things they miss, the things they wish they could have said, and the memories they recall with broken smiles.

Outside of the familiar, fun camp environment, and without the help of the professional grief counselors and volunteers Camp Erin provides, it would be more difficult for these children to share their feelings and learn to heal. Much of the sadness and confusion would stay bottled up inside, where we know it's likely to have an impact later in their lives.

To encourage this kind of openness and to raise awareness of childhood bereavement, the Moyer Foundation and its major sponsor, the New York Life Foundation, have started a National Memory Board Project online.

Children, families, and adults who have experienced the death of someone close are invited to share a photo and/or memory of their loved one through social media.

The Memory Board Project has its roots in a signature activity of Camp Erin. During a special ceremony on the first night of camp, campers have the opportunity to place a photo of their loved one on the memory board and share their story. At the conclusion of the ceremony, the memory board serves as a visual reminder to campers that they are not alone in their grief.

To participate in the National Memory Board Project, post a story and/or photo on Twitter or on the Moyer Foundation's Facebook page with the hashtag #MemoryBoard. To see the complete collection, visit www.moyerfoundation.org/memoryboard.