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About her lies (she was actually for the "Bridge to Nowhere" until it became a national scandal and she realized she could object to the bridge and still keep the money) and what an embarrassment she is intellectually for ambitious women everywhere.
And then I realized I'd fallen for it. I was doing exactly what Karl Rove would want, forgetting all about John McCain and all the reasons that he's the worst choice for president.
McCain (and the seven lobbyists running his campaign) are trying to distract us with Sarah Palin and her endless drama, and it's working.
The Bush administration is a nightmare, and McCain is more of the same, and the GOP knows it. So, instead, they have us focusing on the non-issue of an unqualified vice-presidential candidate whose extreme right-wing neocon views have energized their base in a way their lackluster candidate could not.
The solution: Ignore her.
We should focus on Barack Obama's positives, his concrete plans for change, his tax cuts that will benefit 95 percent of American families, his detailed energy policy containing plans outlined by people as disparate as T. Boone Pickens and Al Gore, his amazing ability to manage people, time and resources.
We should focus on his ability to inspire, command respect and build bridges between entrenched partisans. And on his determination to run a respectful campaign about the issues, aimed at turning our country around at home and regaining our reputation abroad.
As to Palin's "experience," if you think running Alaska's budget is like running America's, think again. Alaska is the Saudi Arabia of America. They're awash in the oil profits that are killing the rest of us. And if you think Palin isn't in the pocket of Big Oil, ask yourself why British Petroleum sponsored her inauguration party.
Don't be fooled - know that it's a con and move on to the real topic.
McCain.
The GOP now has a Teflon female attack dog, and they're expertly using her to distract us with complaints about sexism and privacy that divide us and have us clawing at each other - diverting everyone from the real topic at hand.
Which is that the GOP sold us eight years of a guy "everybody wants to have a beer with," and now they're trying to sell us a woman "everybody wants to carpool with."
They're marketing geniuses. But I don't want a president (or vice president) who's just a regular guy or gal. I want a president who's way smarter than me (no one would pick me as editor of the Harvard Law Review) and way more diplomatic (I'm so rude) to help us figure out how to get out of the mess we're in.
We're in an economic crisis that former Fed chairman Alan Greenspan says is the worst in his lifetime. (At a meeting with the Wall Street Journal, McCain admitted he "doesn't really understand economics.")
Yikes. Can't we elect the smart guy this time? Pretty please?
The truth is, this is not a vice-presidential election. The job becomes relevant only if the commander in chief dies, and if you've seen McCain's 2,000-year-old mom, I think you'll agree he'll last at least eight years.
The more attention we pay to Sarah Palin, the more e-mails we forward about her, the more it becomes a story the mainstream media is justified in covering (and they do LOVE it - she's pretty, she's quippy, she's Tina Fey!) - and the more the far-right voters will turn out. Especially women incensed that the "liberal media" is picking on her.
Sure she's an awful candidate, but we have to focus on motivating people to vote FOR Obama.
Palin and the GOP are Lucy, holding the football, enticing us to kick it. And every time we focus on Palin, we become Charlie Brown, falling for it, doing exactly what they want.
It's the politics of distraction.
If you believe Obama is the right choice, ignore her. Stop letting her turn the election into a combination of "Desperate Housewives" and "American Idol." (And never forget, we're a nation where more people vote for the "Idol" than for president.)
And when it's all over, if we still want the drama of a pretty, D-student, sarcastic, vitriolic, neocon woman spewing outright lies, no worries.
We'll always have Ann Coulter. *
Cathryn Michon is an actress, comic, screenwriter and author of the book "The Grrl Genius Guide to Life." She made decent grades at Northwestern but is in no way qualified to be vice president. Contact her at www.grrlgenius.com.
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