Common Pleas Judge Nicholas M. D'Alessandro, 81

It was a decision nobody should have to make.

But the judge had no choice. The life or death of a woman suffering from amyotrophic lateral sclerosis - paralyzed, in constant pain, and begging to die, was his decision alone.

It was probably the toughest call that Philadelphia Common Pleas Court Judge Nicholas M. D'Alessandro would ever have to make.

After interviewing Thelma Stussy, 51, who could only blink her eyes and nod, in her room at Neumann Medical Center in Kensington, along with members of her family, he ruled in April 1990 that the hospital could turn off the respirator that was keeping her alive.

Judge D'Alessandro, 81, a much-honored Philadelphia judge for 24 years, a community activist, a proud son of Manayunk, and a devoted family man, died Saturday, Sept. 5, of complications from a stroke.

Although the decision to honor the wishes of Stussy, suffering from what is commonly called Lou Gehrig's disease, might have been his most emotionally wrenching, he heard cases that ran the gamut of criminal and civil topics that define the judicial world of a big city.

Many of them made headlines, such as monitoring the NFL players' strike in 1987, when replacement players were hired by the owners, and hearing the dispute between the city and the Eagles over obligations under the lease for Veterans Stadium.

He also presided over the lawsuit between the Philadelphia Zoo and the company that owned and operated its monorail, the issue being the safety of the rail line.

But one of Judge D'Alessandro's proudest accomplishments was his part in the battle to keep his cherished alma mater, Roman Catholic High School, open after the Philadelphia Archdiocese decided to close it in 1985.

Judge D'Alessandro, as president of the alumni association, helped lead the fight to prevent the closing, and succeeded in persuading Cardinal John Krol, then the archbishop, to keep it open. It is thriving today.

"He was kind, generous, and compassionate," said his daughter Kara Bielli. "He was a perfect judge, so fair and compassionate. People felt comfortable in his courtroom."

Bielli noted that her father finished his career as a Family Court judge, in which he worked with families to benefit children who were brought before the court.

"He thought it would be a good way to end his career, taking care of children," his daughter said.

Judge D'Alessandro was proud of being from Manayunk. In an Inquirer article in 1990, reporter Virginia A. Smith noted that he pronounced Hermitage Street, where he grew up and lived, as "Hermi-taige."

"When he goes shopping along Ridge Avenue, he heads 'up the Ridge,' " Smith wrote. "Playground sliding boards are 'Kelly boards,' and ants are 'antemeyers.' And to those who say otherwise, he jokes, 'You talk funny.' "

Judge D'Alessandro had a rich sense of humor. His daughter recounted that her father and some colleagues in the court system started an imaginary "Nice Guys Club" and tried to solicit members. The joke was that they couldn't find any.

Judge D'Alessandro was born in Philadelphia to Nicholas S. D'Alessandro, an immigrant from Abruzzi, Italy, and Nancy DiGiovanni. They operated a tavern on Hermitage and their children, including the future judge, lived above it.

"It was a nice neighborhood taproom," Judge D'Alessandro once said.

Judge D'Alessandro graduated from Roman in 1952, and went on to Temple University Law School, graduating in 1959. He practiced law until his election to Municipal Court in 1977. He also served as an assistant city solicitor and member of the city's Tax Review Board.

In 1964, he married Elizabeth McHenry after meeting her while vacationing in Margate, N.J.

He was elected to Common Pleas Court in 1979. In his retention votes in 1989 and 1999, he received the most votes of any of the jurists up for retention. He retired in 2003.

Judge D'Alessandro was a longtime coach in the 21st Ward Baseball League and a founding member of the Cor Mariae Knights of Columbus Council, of which he was a fourth degree knight. He was a founding member of the Greater Roxborough Lodge of the Order Sons of Italy in America. He also was a member of the executive committee of the 21st Ward Democratic Committee.

In 2003, the law firm of Drinker, Biddle & Reath honored him for his dedication and service to Family Court.

Besides his wife and daughter, he is survived by a son, Nicholas M. Jr.; another daughter, Teresa Gault; a sister; and six grandchildren.

A Funeral Mass will be said at 10 a.m. Thursday, Sept. 10, at Holy Family Church, 234 Hermitage St. Friends may call from 7 p.m. Wednesday, Sept. 9, at Koller Funeral Home, 6835 Ridge Ave., and from 9 a.m. Thursday at the funeral home. Burial will be at Calvary Cemetery.

Donations may be made to the Roman Catholic Alumni Association, 301 N. Broad St., Philadelphia 19107.