Now we know what Bigfoot looks like.
“It looks like my ex-husband,” a woman said after seeing what a hunter says is a Sasquatch he shot in Texas.
Rick Dyer says he gunned one of the mythical man-beasts near San Antonio in September 2012, but couldn’t take full possession until recently because of a dispute with investors.
“I have been worried for so long, I have been put off for so long, finally we went up to Washington and got the body,” he says on a video clip, part of a report at KSAT-TV in San Antonio.
On the way back he let about 130 people get sneak peeks, including, ahem, Mrs. Yeti. Many of their reactions were recorded for a YouTube video.
“We definitely made them believers,” he told KSAT.
Judging from a newly released photo of whatever it is, it’s a graybeard that seems to have red-and-blue bruising around its broad nose and shut eyes.
The thin strands of long unmatted hair suggest, at least to this untrained eye, more exposure to conditioner or a hairbrush than sweat, bugs, dirt and the great outdoors.
Funny, but this Bigfoot bears little resemblance to the creature briefly captured on a video shot earlier the same day, before supposedly being lured to its doom by pork ribs Dyer nailed to a tree.
It also bears little likeness to the carcass Dyer claimed in 2008 was a Bigfoot shot in woods in Georgia.
That one, the New York Times wrote, “resembled a gorilla — or maybe an old sheepskin rug — lying twisted in a freezer, with a dollop of intestines protruding from its belly.”
Later, Dyer said he was just kidding about that one, according to a CNN article:
"Car salesman Rick Dyer and now-fired police officer Matt Whitton — said the whole situation began as a joke and then got out of hand. ‘It's just a big hoax, a big joke,’ Dyer said.
“Bigfoot doesn't exist," he told a CNN affiliate, even though he organized Bigfoot hunts.
The story “got legs and ran,” Dyer quipped on camera.
But this new corpse is the real deal, Dyer says.
"I have the body, and I will show you. Bring your doctors and bring your checkbook," he said.
A news conference presenting scientific confirmation, including DNA evidence, is scheduled for Feb. 9, according to Andrew Clayce, marketing manager for Dyer's Team Tracker and BigFootToday.com (which was either blocked or having technical problems this afternoon).
Later next month, a second event will spread the word to the public about possibilities like buying tickets to see the corpse on tour.
“The specimen will be taken around one way or another. ... It depends on which offer we take up," Clayce said.
A photo tweeted by Dyer in December shows a photo of a trailer with big print proclaiming, “See the Only Dead Big Foot."
It also offered a defiant title: "The I Told You So Tour."
Contact staff writer Peter Mucha at 215-854-4342 or firstname.lastname@example.org.