Q: I invited this guy I'm talking to over for a home-cooked meal. I couldn't help but notice that he had really bad gas. At one point, it was so awful that it almost made me gag. But he never said anything. He just acted like everything was normal, and so did I. I live in a small apartment, so there was no escaping the rotten smell. I don't know whether it was the beef I served or maybe the vegetables. My stomach was churning a little bit, too. But whatever it was, I was completely grossed out. He wanted to make out, but I couldn't with that stench hovering in my apartment.
Mia: Here's a news flash: They all do it. Women do, too. Princess, you'd better lighten up.
If he's an otherwise nice guy, don't make a big deal out of his intestinal issues. Plenty of women would be thrilled just to have a guy come over and plant himself on the couch. Next time, he's over, open a window and light some scented candles. Ask in advance if he has any food issues. He'll be grateful.
Steve: Light candles? You want the place to explode, Mia? Invite him over again, and this time, pull out a bottle of Beano (or another anti-gas medicine), take a couple of tablets and offer him some as well. If he declines, gently suggest that he really should take them if he wants to stay in the game.
Q: The other night, I was complaining about not having had sex when my husband mumbled something about being gay. He said it only once. When I tried to get him to elaborate, he clammed up. When I brought it up again, he said he'd only been joking. I tried talking to him about it a few days later, but he got angry, so I backed off. But I can't forget the comment. Things between us are a little flat in the bedroom department but otherwise OK. I keep myself up. What do you think?
Mia: Run to the nearest relationship counselor. If your husband won't go, too, go without him.
There's a lot of information online about this subject, and I suggest you start educating yourself. A good place to start is the Straight Spouse Network (201-825-7763).
Whatever you do, don't blame yourself - and trust your instincts. If he's in denial about his sexuality, don't let him make this about some shortcoming on your part. Be prepared to move on if you have to. Good luck to you.
Steve: I agree with Mia. If he won't discuss it, you'll need to get counseling. You can't have a healthy relationship if your partner is unable to communicate about sex.
Steve is a 50-something married man who's been around the block. Mia is a younger, recently married woman with an all-together different attitude. They may not agree, but they have plenty of answers. Contact them at S&M@phillynews.com or S&M c/o Daily News, 801 Market St., Philadelphia, PA 19107.