Hot for a co-worker, even though she has two kids at home
When you had children, did you not understand that being their parent was your first duty?
Q: I'm not in love with my husband anymore, but we stay together for our two young children. I've become extremely attracted to a co-worker, and fantasize about him nonstop. We've made out a few times after he's driven me to my car. My husband is older and doesn't get many erections anymore, so our sex life is nonexistent. The guy at work is younger and voracious. I'm thinking about telling my husband so at least he will know I'm considering moving on. I'm too young to be in a sexless marriage. The only thing stopping me is my kids, who really love their dad.
Steve: You're having two idiotic thoughts:
1. One of Steve & Mia's rules is NOT to get involved romantically with someone you work with directly. That avoids the risk of your romantic life and your work life being ruined at same time.
2. When you had children, did you not understand that being their parent was your first duty? You figure you could just dump 'em if you want a new romance? Speaking of being dumped, you think a young man would want a serious relationship with a married older woman who has two kids? If so, you're three for three in idiocy.
Mia: You say you and your husband stay together just for the children. Does he have any idea of this? Sounds like it's just you who's got the itch to wander.
If you truly don't love your husband anymore, don't stay married just for the kids. An unhappy home is not a healthy place to raise children.
Q: I've been with my boyfriend for three years, but he says he can't marry me anytime soon because his hands are full taking care of his elderly mother, who has dementia. His two brothers are losers who never help. I'm trying really hard to be patient, but my biological clock is ticking (I'm in my early 40s). When he asked me what I wanted for Christmas, I told him a ring. I told him I loved him and wanted to spend the rest of my life with him. What else can I do to move things along?
Mia: Find a new boyfriend who wants kids, fast, or give up that dream and stay with your man - if you're sure he isn't just a commitment-phobe hiding behind his mother's illness.
Steve: Your relationship is lame. So you must decide: Love with lame or roll the dice and maybe meet someone new who isn't using his sick mom as an excuse.
Between them, Steve and Mia have logged more than a few decades in the single-and-dating world. They're also wise to the ways of married life. They don't always agree, but they have plenty of answers. Contact them at S&M c/o Daily News, 801 Market St., Philadelphia, PA 19107 or steveandmia@phillynews.com.