Hairiness is the root of her problem

DEAR ABBY: My husband and I are having a disagreement about one of our daughters (we have three). Our 8-year-old is very hairy. It is noticeable, and she doesn't like wearing shorts, skirts or dresses because of it. Her classmates tease her about it.

I want to teach her how to shave her legs or show her how to use hair remover. Her father is angry that I want to "do this" to his little girl.

I was a hairy child as well, and I was teased about my hairy legs and my unibrow, which my parents wouldn't let me shave or pluck. I remember how painful it was, how upset it made me and how different I felt from my classmates because of it. I told myself as a child that when I grew up, I'd never let my daughter go through the same torment. I still feel that way.

Should we wait a few more years, or should I buy the products I need and teach her what she'll be doing for the rest of her life?

- Hairy Situation in Arizona

DEAR H.S.: Your husband may mean well, but he may not realize what being the object of ridicule can do to a little girl's self-esteem. You're that child's mother, and you know what to do - so do it. Sometimes girls have to stick together, and this is one of them.

DEAR ABBY: After 26 years of marriage, I recently left my husband. We live only a few blocks away from each other, so we run into each other often at the store, the gas station, everywhere.

My problem is more about running into some of the women he cheated on me with. One of them always ends up at the same shopping center or restaurant I happen to be at. She thinks I don't know who she is.

It has really gotten to me. What can I tell her the next time she meets up with me? I want to keep myself from yelling at her. Please help me.

- Can't Find the Words in Houston

DEAR CAN'T: You don't know whether the woman your ex cheated with is stable or some kind of wing nut. Sometimes it's safer not to be able to "find the words" rather than pick a fight. My advice is to avoid her as much as possible.