Weighing in on having a 2nd child
DEAR ABBY: "Maybe Only One in Georgia," who asked whether she should have a second child, needs to understand that there are no guarantees. Her 5-year-old could end up hating her younger sibling, or adoring her. Parents create a child because they want to share their union with a new life.
"Maybe" should not produce another child to be a playmate to the one they have. It should be done only if they're financially, emotionally and spiritually willing and capable of rearing another person. If not, they should enjoy the extra time, money and energy they'll have, and perhaps give a needy dog or cat a home.
- Youngest Child in Savannah
DEAR YOUNGEST CHILD: I told "Maybe" I couldn't decide this for her, but would open up the question to my readers. And they sure had some comments! Here are a few:
DEAR ABBY: My advice is don't! I have two sons, 27 and 31. They hardly know each other and have no interest in what the other is doing. It breaks my heart, as they are the only close blood relatives they have.
I didn't have the younger one so the older would have company. I wanted another baby. I was 29, but wouldn't consider it at the age of "Maybe" (38). How long does she think she can run that fast?
- Mitzi in Dayton
DEAR ABBY: Most only children I know are spoiled and used to getting their own way, largely because they haven't had to share. I feel it is unfair to raise a child alone if you're able to add to the family unit.
- Grateful Mom
DEAR ABBY: I am a happy only child. I was raised by kind people. I have a positive self-image, was a self-reliant kid and am a confident, productive adult.
As a child, I wondered what it would be like to have a brother or sister, but my imaginary friends were good company. When my aging parents were ailing, it might have been nice to have a sibling to share that with, but my husband was ample support.
- Anne in Illinois