Wednesday, September 3, 2014
Inquirer Daily News

Her wild-child son is ruining her life

DEAR ABBY: My son is almost 3. He is the light of my life. I love him more than I can describe, but sometimes I can't handle his energy. We carefully monitor how much sugar he eats and we are sure his diet is not what's causing the problem. Mostly I think he is just a rowdy little boy.

The problem is, we can't take him out without dreading that he will act up. His refusal to listen to our requests - or listen to us when we speak to him at all - has put a strain on our marriage and we both feel like "failure" parents.

What are some things we can do to help our son channel his energy in a positive way, while getting some relief from his nonstop go-go attitude?

- Needs Relief in Kansas

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  • DEAR NEEDS RELIEF: This may be a phase your son is going through; however, it would be a good idea to discuss this with his pediatrician to make sure. While little children can be human "Energizer bunnies," I am concerned that you say the boy doesn't listen when you talk to him. Tell the doctor and ask if a hearing check is in order.

    As to your son's acting up when you take him out - he should be told the rules and the penalties for not following them before you leave the house. If he doesn't obey the rules, it is important that you follow through, whether that means he will be taken outside for a talk or taken home. Remember, consistency is the key. That's the way children learn.

    If you are older parents and not active, consider enrolling the boy in sports activities, such as swimming or kiddie gym. I am told there are even karate classes for children your son's age.


    DEAR ABBY: Twenty years ago I fell in love, but never told the man how I felt. We spent a lot of time together back then, but I was always afraid to confess my feelings because we were both married to other people. Time went by and we went our separate ways, but I have thought about him many times. A month ago I looked him up on Facebook, and we have reconnected.

    Should I tell him how I feel about him? I'm afraid he may not feel the same way. My question is, should you always tell people how you feel, even if it may hurt someone else - like his wife and my husband?

    - In a Quandary in San Antonio

    DEAR IN A QUANDARY: My answer is no. If this man is attracted to you or might like a fling, it could spark an affair in which two innocent people would be devastated. And if the feelings aren't mutual, you will look like a home-wrecking fool, so keep it to yourself and back off.

    Dear Abby
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