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He's off the booze, but it keeps her afloat

DEAR ABBY: A little over a year ago, my husband and I were pulled over after a day on our boat. We had been drinking. My husband was charged with a DUI, went through everything that was required and decided to stop drinking.

My husband is a recovering alcoholic, but I still like to relax with a beer.
My husband is a recovering alcoholic, but I still like to relax with a beer.Read more

DEAR ABBY: A little over a year ago, my husband and I were pulled over after a day on our boat. We had been drinking. My husband was charged with a DUI, went through everything that was required and decided to stop drinking.

I am very proud of him. Going to AA meetings has kept him strong, and he has become a better person.

I, on the other hand, like to relax with a beer once in a while, but if I do, I feel guilty. My husband says it's OK, but I feel it might tempt him.

Am I doomed not to be able to drink anymore to support his sobriety, or can I have a beer once in a while and hope he has learned to cope?

Is having an occasional beer selfish?

- Needs a Drink in New York

DEAR NEEDS A DRINK: When someone describes not imbibing alcohol as being "doomed" and signs off as "needs a drink," I suspect that the individual may be alcohol-dependent to some degree.

If there is any chance that your sober husband might crave alcohol if he sees you having a beer, then do it when you're not in his presence. I call that being considerate and "sacrificing" for the greater good.

DEAR ABBY: What do you do when your daughter chooses to raise her kids entirely differently than she was raised, and when she comes for a visit, there's no regard or respect for your stuff?

- Up in Arms in Florida

DEAR UP IN ARMS: You childproof your home, or make sure to see your grandchildren only at their home.