At 19, is she old enough to move out?
DEAR ABBY: I'm a 19-year-old high-school graduate working full time as a general manager for a furniture corporation. I live at home with my parents, but I feel like I am ready financially and emotionally to move out into my own place. I'm afraid to tell my parents because we are so close.
My father has always said he won't let me move out unless he approves of the place, and he talks about random checkups of my apartment. If I move out, aren't I entitled to privacy in my own place? How do I approach them about this without it becoming a screaming match, or ruining the relationship with them?
- Unsettled in Washington
DEAR UNSETTLED: At 19, you are a young adult and no longer a child. You hold a responsible job and, I assume, have enough savings that you can afford what you are contemplating.
That your father wants to protect you is understandable because you are his child. Approach the subject by telling your parents you are "considering" moving out on your own, and would like your father to help you select a place that is safe. If he refuses, you can still go looking on your own.
Your father is not your parole officer, and it is respectful to call before dropping by.
DEAR ABBY: When did men decide it was "stylish" to wear a two-day growth of beard? It is twice as wrong if they have gray in their beard. Please tell the men of America to shave!
- Style Policewoman in Ohio
DEAR STYLE POLICEWOMAN: As I recall, after the TV series "Miami Vice" became a hit, five o'clock shadows became the rage, as did going sockless in loafers and wearing a lot of pastels.
On the right person, the look can be sexy . However, I agree that when a man's beard starts turning gray, a clean shave is a better look because after a "certain age" the stubble begins to resemble that of an old derelict rather than a Hollywood sex symbol.