Updated: Friday, September 29, 2017, 2:15 PM
Weyerbacher, the Easton-based brewer with the cleverly named beers, has added a new fall beverage to its lineup.
This one, for football season, is called Dallas Sucks, and it’s an ale as pale as Jerry Jones. According to Weyerbacher, the beer was made “for tailgating in parking lots, celebrating first downs and big hits, high-fiving friends and basking in the thrill of victory.”
It has a 4.5% ABV and three types of hops. Almost as much hop as a healthy Darren Sproles.
The Fort Worth Star-Telegram was not amused: “Friends? First downs? Victory?” wrote Stephen Schroats. “I thought we were talking about Philadelphia. That’s where Santa Claus got booed and pelted with snowballs. Where the stadium comes complete with its own basement jail and court of law.”
Patrik Walker at 247Sports wrote: “What the brew clearly wasn’t made for is celebrating Super Bowl victories.”
Talk about a guy who needs a frosty cold one.
Smitty at barstoolsports.com, however, had a different view: “It says ‘Dallas Sucks!’ on the can. It could be filled with goat piss fermented in Pennzoil and every maniac tailgating in Jetro will not only view it as ‘totally downable.’ It would be revered, like I said, as sweet nectar from the God’s. A pure drink from the Heavens.”