Sideshow: David Letterman: 'Awash in melancholia' at exist from 'Late Show'

David Letterman speaks onstage at Spike TV's 'Don Rickles: One Night Only' on May 6, 2014 in New York City. (Photo by Theo Wargo/Getty Images for Spike TV)

Life without David Letterman

Hardly seems possible! Who'd want to continue living once David Letterman abandons his post as host of CBS' The Late Show on May 20, ending a 33-year career on the tube?

Letterman says that, contrary to rumors, he's not being forced out of the late-night game by what he calls "the Jimmys" - Jimmy Kimmel and The Tonight Show's Jimmy Fallon.

"No, they didn't push me out," DL tells the New York Times. "I'm 68. If I was 38, I'd probably still be wanting to do the show." While he's being a realist about his life-changing decision, DL says he can't but be "awash in melancholia. I'll miss it, desperately." Adds DL, "One of two things: There will be reasonable, adult acceptance of transition. Or I will turn to a life of crime."


Custody fight for Rosie O'Donnell

Comic Rosie O'Donnell, who has split from wife Michelle Rounds, is about to go a few rounds in court with her ex. Rounds has filed for sole custody of their adopted daughter, Dakota, 2. The celeb's formerly significant other tells Entertainment Tonight that she can provide a "healthier . . . [and] way more protective" environment for the child than Rosie could. Rosie splurges on 24/7 nanny care for Dakota, but Rounds says she gives her child "mild discipline instead of . . . carte blanche, do whatever you want." Rosie's lawyer tells the TV news magazine, "This is an absurd and desperate attempt to use a child for her own gain."


Gossip petits fours

Don't cry for Britney Spears. Yes, she had a nasty spill while twerking Wednesday night at Planet Hollywood Resort and Casino in Vegas. Her ankle was hurt, but she's OK. No wonder: USA Today says her two-year Vegas stint is pulling in $310,000 a show. . . . It's true! Metal-schlock act Kiss costars with Scooby Doo in Rock and Roll Mystery, an animated feature available online July 10.