Sunday, May 24, 2015

Kim Kardashian files for divorce!

Kim Kardashian's two-month marriage to Kris Humphries is over after measly two months.

Kim Kardashian files for divorce!

The Gossip-o-sphere has gone into hyper-drive today with news that the Kim Kardashian-Kris Humphries marriage, which served as a paradigm of the perfect marriage for millions of Americans is officially coming to an end after 72, no-doubt, glorious days.

Kim filed for divorce today, citing the mother of all divorce excuses, “irreconcilable differences.” Why did she pick Halloween? We are mystified.

Sure, it’s not the shortest celeb marriages on record ((Britney Spears anyone?). But it's pretty close, especially considering the extraordinary hype that surrounded their courtship and wedding.

This is no rumor, It’s all true, friends.

More coverage
 
Kelly Ripa, Nick Lachey dress as Kim and Kris
 
Good Day Philly's Mike Jerrick also dresses up as Kim K. and foreshadows divorce?
 
Kardashian rakes in nearly $18 million on wedding
 
Kardashian, Humphries, kaput?
 
How Kardashians rigged voting on ‘DWTS’
 
Kim & Kris tie the knot
Video: Kim Kardashian Gets Engaged
 
Kim, Kris wed; a show due in Oct.

No less a celebrity than radio celeb-chatter and American Idol host Ryan Seacrest has confirmed the news in a tweet: "Yes @kimkardashian is filing for divorce this morning," Seacrest tweeted. "I touched base with her, getting a statement in just a few minutes."

TMZ says Kim, a professional celebrity, wants the court to reject any move by Kris, a mere ball player, to get spousal support.

She's covered: She had Kris sign a pre-nuptial agreement.

Frankly, we can’t imagine that Kris, who reportedly earned $3.2 mil last season with the New Jersey Nets, would want to shake her down for money.

Yet, money has been the running motif in this entire fiasco of a marriage:

Kris reportedly gave Kim a 20.5 carat, $2 million engagement ring. The rock and the impending nuptials were a subject of much discussion on Kim’s lucrative reality show, Keeping Up with the Kardashians.

Turns out it was a good investment:

The couple earned a reported $17.9 mil form their wedding -- $15 mil alone for selling their wedding as a TV special for E! Entertainment.

And they raked in more than $500,000 worth of freebies and gifts, including Kim’s $60,000 Vera Wang wedding gown and $150,000 (!) worth of free hair and makeup care.

Money sure made this blessed family go round.

Nary a comment yet from either party.

Kim’s latest tweet, sent around 11 a.m. today, wasn’t about the tragic end of her marriage, but  … money.

It hyped her new store:

@KimKardashian Kim Kardashian

Our store #KardashianKhaos is opening tomorrow at 9am at @TheMirageLV We are so excited!! Kardashian Khaos has arrived!

We’re so, soo, sooo very excited too!

Inquirer Sideshow Columnist
About this blog
Tirdad Derakhshani was born in Tehran, Iran, and raised in London and rural North Jersey, where he closely studied a theoretical, radical post-Hegelian approach to cow-tipping. He moved to Philadelphia in the mid-‘80s to seek enlightenment, and instead received a B.A. in literature at Penn. While pursuing doctoral studies in modern religious thought and philosophy, he worked at the Inquirer as a news clerk, researcher, editor, and entertainment writer.

He hopes SideShow will help citizens better understand the vicissitudes of the Consumerist-Military-Industrial-Infotainment Complex, or, in other words, why Britney Spears has a tendency to shave her head, Brangelina to adopt children, and Lindsay Lohan to crave imprisonment. Read SideShow every morning.


Reach Tirdad at sideshow@phillynews.com.

Tirdad Derakhshani Inquirer Sideshow Columnist
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