Sideshow: Miss Pa. loses to Trump

Donald Trump

plays for keeps, yo. When former Miss Pennsylvania

Sheena Monnin

accused his Miss Universe Org. (which he runs in partnership with NBC) of rigging the Miss Universe pageant, the Donald filed an arbitration claim against her for $5 million for defaming his poor, defenseless pageant. Late last week, he won. He calls it "an expensive lesson" for Monnin.

In a truly stiff and deserved sentence,

Christopher Chaney

of Jacksonville, Fla., the man who hacked into the e-mail accounts of

Scarlett Johansson

,

Mila Kunis

, and

Christina Aguilera

, was given a prison sentence of 10 years. In a tearful statement, Johansson said she had been humiliated by the hacks, in which nude photos intended for her then-hub

Ryan Reynolds

were leaked onto the Internet.

We stagger. We tear our tutus and toupees. We cry, "No! Never!" A flood of reports says that what goes on in reality-TV shows

may not be the absolute truth

. As in fake. Phony. Fraudulent.

Is it all just dirty, rotten lies? Yup, say survivors of Dancing With the Stars, The Hills, various Kardashian stuff, and even House Hunters! Bobi Jensen says Hunters was hokum! Dave Hester, former star of former Storage Wars, has sued A&E, alleging rigged interviews, planted items, staged auctions. Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt, mostly penniless these days, say their show The Hills was replete with bogusitude. TLC's Breaking Amish is awash in charges that its former-Amish folks are faux. In a recent autobio, soccer goddess Hope Solo says Maksim Chmerkovskiy, her pro partner on DWTS, slapped her - and the shows were scripted. Oh, it's depressing. Next, they'll tell us there's no Easter Possum!

Paul "DJ Pauly D" DelVecchio

(

Jersey Shore

) has not signed renewal papers with MTV for his alleged reality show,

The Pauly D Project

. He's said to be in talks with E! Network for a show, with more money involved.

The three leading ladies in the 2012 weight-loss department are . . . singer

Kelly Clarkson

, tied for second with grubslinger

Paula Deen

, each with a reported loss of 30 pounds . . . but they don't hold a tallow candle to

Jessica Simpson

, who, with four-a-week workouts and a protein-and-veggie-rich diet, shed a reported 60 pounds. All three landed on big magazine covers.

A hoax on social media site reddit had

Morgan Freeman

, for some reason a frequent target among Internet idiots, saying the Newtown, Conn., shootings were overhyped. Morgan's people denied it, and the hoax was traced to some dude named Mark in Vancouver. . . . On Tuesday, a judge finalized

Zooey Deschanel

's divorce from

Death Cab for Cutie

guy

Ben Gibbard

, ending a marriage of three whole years. . . .

Rihanna

just bought a $12 million pad in Pacific Palisades, Calif. Hey, that's the one

we

wanted! . . . Tuesday is Classic Joke Day on

Ellen DeGeneres

' Twitter account. Here's yesterday's: "Why did the bee have sticky hair? Because he used a honeycomb." . . . On the

Bill Cosby

website (

» READ MORE: http://billcosby.com/polls

), you can vote for your fave Cos sweater from his old TV-show days. A couple of the photos portray Cos looking at the fabulous

Phylicia Rashad

in rather admiring fashion.