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Playboy founder and priapic patriarch Hugh Hefner, 85, is defending his prowess from a frontal media assault launched by his ex-fiancee. Hef is miffed that Crystal Harris told Howard Stern that he, Hef, lacks staying power, People says. Harris, nubile and pneumatic at 25, said sex with Hef lasted "like two seconds." She said she had sex with the octogenarian only once and has never suffered the sight of his naked body. The nerve!

"Crystal lied about our relationship . . . but I don't know why," Hef tweeted Tuesday night (he later deleted the tweet). "Maybe a new boyfriend?" Hef described a pattern of dishonest behavior he said was at last Crystal clear. "Crystal convinced me that she adored me," he said. "That was the first lie." Hef added, with rue, "I feel sorry for Crystal. . . . She seems lost."

Perhaps that's why Crystal is (allegedly) dating Dr. Phil's son, Jordan McGraw? Maybe she hopes the good doc will heal her delusional, lost soul?

Appreciation for a great talent lost? Devotion to a fallen star? Macabre curiosity? Whatever the reason, music fans are snapping up Amy Winehouse's album Back to Black. A surge of posthumous popularity has carried the album back onto the Billboard chart following the singer's death on Saturday, the Associated Press reports. The album ranked No. 9, with 37,000 sold in the United States in the last week. The figures, from Nielsen SoundScan data, were released late Tuesday. Winehouse's debut album Frank also sold 7,000 copies, almost all by digital download.

Richards recalls Sheen shenanigans

Denise Richards, ex-consort of Baron of Bizarre Charlie Sheen, adds a little more to a waiting world's knowledge of that wondrous night in October when the future torpedo of truth trashed a New York hotel room and terrorized porn star Capri Anderson.

Richards, who was staying at the hostelry in question, the Plaza Hotel, on the night in question, reveals that she had broken bread with the future torp and a couple of his porn-star pals earlier in the evening.

"Charlie invited me to this dinner with 'friends,' and once I realized what these women did for a living, I thought, 'It's one meal; you can suck it up and get through it,' " Richards recalls in her hot-off-the- presses memoir The Real Girl Next Door. "It's not my place to judge how they make a paycheck."

After dinner, Richards put daughters Sam, 7, and Lola, 6, to bed and turned in herself, only to be awakened by noise in the hallway, "including walkie-talkies, which is never a good sign," she writes. Sheen was taken to a hospital by ambulance, and Richards followed to make sure he was OK: "After making sure Charlie was stable and settled, the nice policeman gave me a ride back." New York's Finest!

Expectant mom Jessica Alba has instructed hub Cash Warren to buy her a $54,000 gold and diamond Franck Muller watch as a "push present" for delivering their second child. "Jessica picked out the watch and told Cash to get it for her," an Anonymous Pal reveals to In Touch. Jess, 30, also told Cash, 32, to have the bauble engraved, but didn't dictate the message, so she won't know what it says until she actually gets it. Surprises make life so interesting.

Us Weekly says smooth-talkin' Swedish vampire seducer Eric Northman (known to the taxman as actor Alexander Skarsgård) will no longer be drawing blood-platelet snacks from Kate Bosworth's neck. The couple have broken up after two years. Proof? Us says Alexander "flirted with a brunette" at a bash last week at Comic-Con in San Diego, "and left the party with her."

The Wells Fargo Center in Philadelphia was No. 7 worldwide among the top-grossing entertainment venues that hold 15,001 people or more, according to Billboard. The magazine, which looked at the six months of concerts ended May 31, said the Wells Fargo Center grossed $28.25 million, making it the second-highest-

ranking U.S. venue after Madison Square Garden in New York. No. 1: the O2 Arena in London, which grossed $85.42 million, followed by the Rod Laver Arena in Melbourne, Australia, with $65.04 million.

"Bands love playing here and our fans enjoy seeing their favorite acts at the Wells Fargo Center," said Comcast-Spectacor president Peter Luukko, who called the ranking an "honor" and "a true testament" to the musicians, fans who support live music, promoters, and others involved.

He may have lost Kat Von D, but Jesse James did have one very important piece of good news this week: He gained sole custody of his daughter, Sunny, 7, multiple sources report.

The decision by a judge in Orange County, Calif., comes after a long and unpleasant legal spat between James, 42, and Sunny's mom, porn actress Janine Lindemulder. Sunny will live in Texas with Dad. Lindemulder will have to go into inpatient rehab if she wants to move to Texas and be near Sunny, says James' lawyer John Schilling. If she stays in California, she'll be limited to monitored visits with Sunny. "Jesse feels vindicated," Schilling tells People mag. "This is what he's been claiming all along, that Janine needs therapy."

In other Jess-related news, his ex-betrothed, the bodacious body inkster Kat, walked out of an interview on Good Day LA after a video clip showed her getting his name tattooed on the already crowded canvas that is her body. "Dear GoodDayLA, thanks for the waste of a perfectly good morning," she huffed on Twitter a few minutes later. "Lack of compassion n respect for eachother never fails to dissappoint me."

Britain's advertising standards council banned two makeup ads featuring Julia Roberts and model Christy Turlington Wednesday. The Advertising Standards Authority said the L'Oréal ads, which used digitally messed-with photos, exaggerated the results women could expect from using L'Oréal stuff.  

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