Sideshow: Jaycee Lee Dugard publishing memoirs

California-born kidnap victim

Jaycee Lee Dugard

, who was seized at age 11 and kept hostage by convicted rapist

Phillip Garrido

for 18 years, is publishing her memoirs,

A Stolen Life

.

People mag has published select excerpts, which in turn have been excerpted by the New York Post. "How do you get through things you don't want to do?" Dugard, 31, writes. "You just do. I would do it all again. The most precious thing in the world came out of it . . . my daughters." Both girls, Angel and Starlite, were conceived by Garrido. The book is due Tuesday.

In related - and weird - news, ABC News has hired kidnap victim

Elizabeth Smart

as a part-time pundit.

So, what's her field? Not politics, we imagine.

She'll be the network's "Abduction Correspondent," as Gawker puts it. No joke.

Smart, 23, was kidnapped at age 14 from her Salt Lake City bedroom. She was found nine months later. The couple who took her were later convicted.

ABC rep Julie Townsend tells the Daily Beast that Smart will appear "when there are missing children or missing-person cases in the news."

Adds Townsend, "She'll help our viewers better understand missing-person stories from someone with the perspective to know."

In an even stranger note, ABC says Smart will not participate in its two-hour Diane Sawyer-led Jaycee Dugard special.

Things are good in the Land of Anistonia.

Jennifer Aniston has a beau, Justin Theroux. She's getting a Hollywood Walk of Fame star.

What's more, she's taped a dialogic encounter with that most beautifully and boorishly pretentious film pundit James Lipton for an episode of Inside the Actors Studio - and only six years after her rival, Angelina Jolie, charmed the pants off Lipton on the show. (Jolie sent the always effusive Lipton into orbits of verbal ecstasy rarely beheld on TV.)

Jen tells Lipton she's way over that Brad Pitt person, who left her for that Jolie girl.

Jen says her role in 2006's The Break-Up, made while she was divorcing Brad, helped.

"I really enjoyed it," Jen says. "You would think otherwise, because even the producers were like, 'I don't know if we should ask you to do this,' but I was like, why not? Turn the page, let's move on."

Brad, by the way, has so far refused to become Lipton's show-'n'-tell dummy. He has a standing invitation.

Demure. Well-spoken (and well-bred). Names her blog Goop. Quotes

Shakespeare

and bakes pies. Would such an

Uptown Girl

pose sans top in a glossy rag? Not sure

Gwyneth Paltrow

would

- but it seems she

has

.

The Country Strong singer-actor is in a special jewelry insert in Vanity Fair's British edition wearing only underpants, stockings, and - really nice - baubles. Gwyn hasn't forgotten her breeding: She demurely covers her breasts - in each photo - with her delicate hands. A slightly more clothed Uma Thurman also shows off shiny rocks in the mag's August issue.

Even the bestest-sellingest of writers has struggles. Even

John Grisham

of

The Firm

- and

The Chamber

,

The Client

,

A Painted House

,

The Pelican Brief

,

The Rainmaker

, and

The Runaway Jury

- fame.

"I have a file with about 30 rejection letters," he tells Parade of his trouble selling his first novel, A Time to Kill. "I saved all that stuff."

Grisham, 56, always asks his wife of 30 years, Renee Jones, to comment on his new books.

She's not always enthused.

"She tossed a 500-page manuscript at my feet one time," says the author. "There was an opening scene she wasn't very happy with. We had some strong words." But don't fear, fans, "a couple of days later things were fine."

Glee

guy

Chord Overstreet

is making time with 20-year-old

Scream 4

actor

Emma Roberts

, says the New York Daily News. . . .

Mariah Carey

has reclaimed her celeb bod, making her first - paparazzi-heavy - public appearance since being delivered of twins,

Moroccan

and

Monroe

, on April 30. Photos are proliferating on the gossip sites. Yes, she looks fine. Sexy. Not overweight. What a relief! . . .

Bow Wow

, who's 24 now and thus is

Lil' Bow Wow

no more, has a daughter,

Shai

, he reveals on his website. The former child star doesn't name the mother and vows he'll keep his girl out of the spotlight. . . .

Regis Philbin

is trying to sell his Greenwich, Conn., house, which sits on six acres near Mianus River State Park. It's listed for $3.8 mil. In '08, Rege tried unsuccessfully to unload it for $5.9 mil.

In one,

Jake Gyllenhaal

has to do the unthinkable to survive the wild as he braves the plains of Iceland with that slave-driving, rough-'n'-tumble outdoors master

Bear Grylls

on Discovery's

Man vs. Wild

. To survive, mind you, Jake, 30, eats . . . worms. It's epochal,

n'est ce pas

?

Meanwhile, TMZ has captured an apparently soused Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi having a seriously intimate, sexy dance with a tall potted plant.

No, we're not referring to Snooki's Jersey Shore costar, Michael "The Situation" Sorrentino.

It's an actual plant.