Joe Sixpack: Tough test measures your knowledge of beer

SO, YOU THINK you know a lot about beer? Here's a quiz:

A) What is the name of the device attached to a keg to allow for the input of gas and the output of beer?

B) What trait in beer do measurements in degrees of SRM represent?

C) What Munich style of beer is known for the flavor of 4-vinyl guaiacol?

Stumped? Those are just three of more than 140 questions on what may be the world's toughest beer test, the final exam for the Craft Beer Institute's Cicerone Certification Program.

So far, just 23 people have passed the test; twice that many have failed.

Me? I had to Google the definition of "cicerone."

That's the term (pronounced sis-uh-rohn) that the institute's president, Ray Daniels, has adopted to describe what might otherwise be called a "beer sommelier," a professional who helps you select the proper beer for your meal.

It's an old word for a museum guide - an appropriate choice, said Daniels, because "a Cicerone will possess the knowledge and skills to guide those interested in beer culture, including its historic and artistic aspects."

If all that sounds a bit snooty for the Everyman's drink, well, you haven't shopped for beer lately. It's not just the daunting variety of labels that can confound you: As brewers continually crank out new riffs on traditional styles, it's almost impossible to predict what's inside that corked $20 bottle.

"That's one of the reactions I got initially: 'Don't make beer snobby, we don't want to be like the wine guys,' " Daniels said of his year-old program. "I don't think we're in much danger of that. I don't think beer people are snobby at all."

Besides, the program isn't a test of beer trivia, he said. It's designed mainly to help restaurants, wholesalers and breweries provide consistent, high-quality beer to patrons.

For example, because so many people enjoy draft beer, 20 percent of the exam is about the mechanics of tapping systems.

"Almost anyone who has ever gone to a kegger thinks he knows how to operate a draft system," Daniels said. "The truth is, it requires some real study and sophisticated knowledge of a polyglot of nomenclature."

It was questions about draft equipment that thwarted Carolyn Smagalski the first time she took the exam. A knowledgeable online writer known as the Beer Fox and a certified beer judge (another tough exam), Smagalski missed a passing grade by just 5 points.

"Perhaps it would be easier if I worked in beer service and changed kegs or cleaned beer lines on a daily basis," she said. "The fact that it is not easy to [pass] should make restaurateurs stand up and take notice that 'Cicerone' is, indeed, an honor equal to that of 'Sommelier.' "

So, how beer smart are you?

A) A coupler.

B) Standard Reference Method, a scale used to classify the color of beer.

C) 4-vinyl guaiacol is a phenolic compound that smells like cloves, one of the signature aromas of German weissbier.

The Cicerone program offers two levels of certification, with fees starting at $49. Think you've got what it takes? Try the 10-question sample exam at www.cicerone.org.

If you're not prepared for hours of study and long exams just to learn how to pair beer with food, here's a shortcut: www.greatbrewers.com.

The Web site, run by a consortium of brewers and distributors, features an interactive beer sommelier that will guide you to the perfect matches. Just select your dish and the site does everything but crack open the bottle.

How do corn fritters and Flying Dog Tire Bite Kölsch sound? *

"Joe Sixpack" by Don Russell appears weekly in Big Fat Friday. For more on the beer scene in Philly and beyond, visit www.joesixpack.net. Send email to joesixpack@phillynews.com.