Steve & Mia advises older woman turned off by men with beer bellies and man boobs

A friend fixed me up with one of his clients. The guy seemed nice on the phone and then he texted me a photo of himself. We’re almost the same age but what little hair he has is gray and he has a pot belly. He looks more like someone’s dad than the type of man I typically date. Oh, and he talks about his grand baby. I haven’t even had my first child yet. My friend says I’m superficial because I’m rejecting him because of how he looks. But I work out hard almost every day and if I find a gray hair, I pluck it out. If I let myself go like he has, he would never ask me out. Why do guys expect you to be all perfect but they come at you with beer bellies and man boobs?

Steve: Ouch, I resemble that remark. It’s unfair, but men are more visual in what attracts them and women are usually more forgiving. It sounds like you are acting like a “man” here, so if what you see doesn’t attract you, move along.

Mia:  That’s so sexist, Steve. Why is she “acting like a man” if she wants a nice-looking man? She works hard on her body and expects her dates to do the same. If she had a big gut and saggy boobs, he probably wouldn’t even ask her out. He has standards and so does she. Nothing wrong with that. But you are right about her not settling and finding someone else to date.

I’m a 66-year-old widower and trying to get back into dating after a long marriage. I invited a nice lady who knew my late wife to meet for drinks recently and she showed up late. I didn’t like it but I let it go. Then, she sat there and ordered a three-course dinner. I had invited her for drinks! I paid anyway because I like to be a gentleman but I felt taken advantage of.  How do I prevent this from happening again? Do I let the women know in advance that I’m on a fixed income?

Mia:  Don’t be too hard on old girl.  She was hungry so she ordered food. It would have been a classy move if she had offered to pick up the bill but she didn’t. Next time, don’t take a date to a restaurant you can’t afford.

Steve: I would have done what you did and been resentful, too. She arrived late AND hungry. If you have feelings for her, give her a second chance. If not, move on.