Steve and Mia: My ex is having my baby!

My girlfriend has been cheating on me and so I called her the w—- she is.  I am done with her for good this time.  I didn’t even know she was pregnant. I tried to find out what is going on and what she’s going to do about it but she blocked my number and blocked me on social media. I got one of her friends on the phone and she handed the phone to my ex who was slurring like she had been drinking. She has a serious problem with that. You would think she would have stopped since she’s having a baby. I tried to find out what was going on but she hung up on me. Now the friend won’t take my calls either. I’m not sure what to do next.  I know it’s her body but she’s carrying my child or at least I think it is mine.

Mia: Don’t you dare try to blame it all on your ex. You had unprotected sex with a known cheater and now she’s pregnant. The baby could be yours or it could be the mailman’s. This is why you need to think before you whip it out and have unprotected sex just because it feels good. Dumb, dumb move. All you can do is it to keep trying to contact the friend. Maybe send a text. Try writing your ex a letter. If you can get through to her, try to get her to stop drinking. The health of an unborn child is at stake.

Steve: It sounds like all avenues are blocked to you. All you can do is hope is she has a change of heart. But beware — you could be named as the father and that would make you financially responsible. If that happens, demand a paternity test. Maybe you can get on the Maury show.

My husband and I will engage in our first threesome soon and need advice ASAP. (It’s his fantasy not mine.) I’m worried about feeling jealous. How do you keep that from happening?

Mia: That’s one fantasy that’s better left a fantasy. Too many things can go wrong. Don’t do it, girlfriend!

Steve: Make sure No. 3 is ugly.

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