I’m dating a gamer. Me and him have been together six weeks. We recently started having sex and he told me he wants me to have oral sex with him while he’s playing video games. I am scared it could be a bad precedent. My girlfriend said it wasn’t a big deal and that I’m overthinking it. What do you think?
Mia: This isn’t your thing, so don’t you dare do it. You two are still in the getting-to-know-you phase as well you should be. You probably don’t even know his middle name. Do not perform sex tricks on him that put you in an awkward position or make you uncomfortable. You want connection and intimacy. Work on building that part of your relations, not fulfilling some adolescent gamer sex fantasy.
Steve: Fantasies are not always bad, but this might set a precedent. How about when he’s playing you just offer to give him a hand?
I had gastric bypass surgery four years ago and have always struggled with my weight. My soon-to-be mother in law always comments when she sees me on whether my weight is up or down. I want to tell her to shut up but I’m afraid of how my guy may take it. He’s really close to his mother and it’s important to him that the two of us get along. I try and pretend but the reality is that I can’t stand being around her. I feel like she’s constantly judging me.
Steve: Oh, that is mean and I say that as someone who has a few pounds to lose. Since you are to be married, the witch is going to be around, so take Taylor Swift’s advice and shake it off and when she comments about your weight, you return with a sincere compliment about her looks or attire. (Make it sound sincere, anyway.)
Mia: Ignore Steve. You have to meet fire with fire. The next time she opens her mouth to say something to you about your weight, have a witty comeback ready. Say something like, “Stop hating! Instead of watching my waistline, you need to watch your own!” If she’s thin, say, “Did you ever think about picking up a few pounds? Only a dog wants a bone.” Smile when you say it. Repeat if necessary. She’ll eventually get the message and back off. Good luck.