Q: My boyfriend and I are going to a New Year's Eve party and I am dreading it. As the bell rings in the new year, he believes in grabbing as many women as possible and kissing them, even if they're not interested. Out of respect for me, they don't slap him, but I am embarrassed by it. He claims it's an innocent tradition he began in college 10 years ago. Am I overreacting?
Steve: Forced kissing is a tradition. It's called misogyny. Men have been forcing themselves on women forever. Luckily, most men today behave better, but it's a hard habit to break.
If your man seems really in love with you, then tell him you don't mind a kiss, but he must ask the woman before he grabs her .
Mia: Since talking with him hasn't worked, try this: When the clock turns midnight and your man starts kissing on women, you turn and start grabbing men. Kiss them hard, and keep doing it. (If you're shy, let the guys know ahead of time that you'll be coming their way to pucker up.)
Make a big deal about it when you do it. Your guy will either get jealous or else he'll continue doing what he does. You won't end up any worse off, but think of the fun you'll have kissing all the handsome men at the party!
Q: My in-laws showed up unexpectedly over the holidays and have just settled in. I have no idea when they are leaving. I brought it up to my husband, but he's timid. They are very well off, and he's afraid that if they get mad, they will cut us off financially. We need any help we can get, since I'm not working because of our baby. Should I confront them?
Mia: Putting the in-laws out rarely goes over well. My advice is to proceed cautiously, if at all. Maybe try a gentle nudge such as, "Boy, it's been great seeing you! It's time for us to get back into our routine." Good luck.
Steve: Money doesn't talk, it swears. As long as you need the dough, you'll need to be tolerant. One possible move would be to go out with your husband while the grandparents take care of the baby. They may get tired of that.
Between them, Steve and Mia have logged more than a few decades in the single-and-dating world. They're also wise to the ways of married life. They don't always agree, but they have plenty of
answers. Contact them at S&M c/o Daily News, 801 Market St., Philadelphia, PA 19107 or firstname.lastname@example.org.