Getting cozy with a friend (and her hubs) may have cost her a friendship

Q: My best friend got married two years ago to a really great guy. I was the maid of honor. They had a kid, moved to Jersey, the whole nine yards. One day, I was over there partying with her and her husband, and one thing led to another. It wasn't planned. Now my best friend won't return my calls, although her husband has texted me a few times. I'm not sure what to do.

Mia: You screwed her husband; now she's mad. What's not to understand? The next time you're wasted and hanging out at a friend's house, keep your panties on, and you just might keep a friendship.

Steve: Tell hubby you made a big mistake that will not happen again. Then, beg friend's forgiveness. Ideally, you've learned a lesson. Otherwise you're "stupid is as stupid does."

Q: My daughter, a college freshman, stayed overnight at the home of her high school boyfriend after he had surgery. I started asking questions because I spotted a photo of her on her Facebook page in a house I didn't recognize.

I called the mother, and she told me she had allowed it because her son and my daughter had worn her down. My daughter stayed there until the boy's parents asked her to leave, and then she went back to school instead of coming home. The mother let me know that this was not the first time she has had to kick my daughter out.

I'm furious. How do I handle this now that she is an "adult," in college, and living on her own? It's like I don't know her anymore. Her semester ends soon, and I'm not sure I can cope with her when she comes home.

Do I let her go to her boyfriend's house whenever she wants?

Steve: College is where you learn about the world and your own life. Much of it is helpful for your future. Some of it is a screwed-up mess that you will regret.

Tell your daughter the truth about this, but don't try to stop her from doing what she wants. Tell her to listen to "My Old School" by Steely Dan. Learning from mistakes is a good thing.

Mia: There's not much you can do besides making sure that she's on birth control. You don't want her getting pregnant and dropping out of school, do you? You can also talk with her about lazing around at other people's houses, but now that she's over 18, she's going to do what she wants. Counseling to build up her self-esteem might be in order. Good luck.

Between them, Steve and Mia have logged more than a few decades in the single-and-dating world. They're also wise to the ways of married life. They don't always agree, but they have plenty of

answers. Contact them at S&M c/o Daily News, 801 Market St., Philadelphia, PA 19107 or steveandmia@phillynews.com.