Something happened last week that I thought would never happen in my lifetime: I got married. And now, a few days later, it still is an amazement to me.
I never thought that little piece of paper and ceremony would mean this much. If I had any questions about that, it was answered when all of our wedding guests had gone home Saturday night, and Jason and I had time alone. The look of joy on his face was the most beautiful expression I’ve seen in our 10 years together. It was pure joy and empowerment. His look was so reassuring and loving that, in all honesty, even after 10 years, it melted my heart. You can talk all about those 1,100 rights that that piece of paper gives you, but to me the most valuable it thing it gave was that one look — that look of joy on Jason’s face.
For Jason and me, it all started May 20, when our city was about to start issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples. The man in charge, Register of Wills Ron Donatucci, had honored me by having me deputized to assist in handing out the forms. It was reported on the news and Jason called to ask if I’d like him to join me. I think we both knew at that moment that we were helping other couples, so why not us?
Unfortunately, in the rush to get to City Hall, I had forgotten my wallet. City Councilman Jim Kenney (who wanted to be a witness on this historic day for the LGBT community) and Ron heard Jason and me talking and since, according to law, the $80 license fee must be paid in cash, Ron and Jim each paid $40 so Jason and I could get a license. Then, we noticed that the license was only good for 60 days.