Gonzo: Casting votes on a sports ballot

Eugene McCarthy was a U.S. senator from Minnesota. He shouldn't be confused with Joe McCarthy, who was a U.S. senator from Wisconsin. The former liked football. The latter was more concerned with tackling Communists - real or imagined.

Anyway, old Eugene was one of many Americans who saw parallels between his profession and football.

"Being in politics is like being a football coach," McCarthy once said. "You have to be smart enough to understand the game and dumb enough to think it's important."

McCarthy was a senator from 1959 to 1971. Andy Reid became a head coach much later. Any accounts of McCarthy's using "poor English" or grumbling during news conferences were purely coincidental. Probably.

Sports and politics have long been two of the country's favorite pastimes. On the day after Americans went to the polls, Page 2 casts votes for and against certain people and institutions:

Yea – Charlie Manuel: The Phillies manager took some heat after the Fightin's were bounced from the playoffs. Maybe his approval rating isn't as high as it was in 2008, but Manuel still guided the Phils to a third consecutive trip to the National League Championship Series and 97 regular-season wins despite an injury-ravaged roster. Page 2 continues to endorse him.

Nay – Andy Reid: Like most dictators, Reid remains obstinate and arrogant even though his empire routinely has cracked and crumbled in the playoffs. It's long past time for his ouster.

Yea – Ruben Amaro Jr.: This will be the most important off-season campaign of his career. As he said, the Phils need to get younger. They also need to add hitting, bullpen arms, and bench depth. In Amaro we trust - for now.

Nay – Joe Banner: The best roster in the NFL still hasn't won a Super Bowl.

Yea – Jayson Werth's talent: He's a big, righthanded bat on a team that desperately needs production from that side of the plate. Watching him walk won't be easy.

Nay – Werth's attitude: Whichever team signs him will pay a heavy price for his hitting, fielding, throwing, and running. The F-bombs directed at right-field fans will be provided free of charge.

Yea – Phillie Phanatic: An American classic.

Nay – Hip-Hop: An American abomination.

Yea – Ryan Howard's career: He's unquestionably one of the best players in baseball, not to mention Phillies history.

Nay – Ryan Howard's final NLCS at-bat: The memory of him standing there - with the bat on his shoulder while he complained to the umpire - will haunt Philly fans forever.

Yea – Hannah Storm's boots: Sports fans all over the country have pledged allegiance to them.

Nay – Brett Favre's cell: Remember when you were a kid and your parents took away phone privileges when you screwed up? Favre should never be allowed to use his camera phone again. It's in the country's best interest.

Yea – Philly fans: After all those consecutive sellouts, the city deserved better than an early exit from the baseball playoffs.

Nay – San Francisco fans: You're supposed to act as if you've been there. Of course, Giants fans hadn't been there in a long time. After the Giants won the World Series, San Fran fans started some not-so-small fires and hit a few people with a car. Really. http://deadsp.in/cjSHeB

Yea – Allen Iverson in Philadelphia: He was a lot of things - talented, scrappy, petulant, funny, impetuous, and, in the end, finished - but he was never boring.

Nay – Allen Iverson in Turkey: Going there is a bad idea. Someone needs to show him a copy of Midnight Express and scare him out of it.

Yea – Mad Men, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, The League, Dexter: Some of Page 2's favorite television shows.

Nay – The Jersey Shore: It was a novelty at first. Now it's a menace - a threat to our national security (and sanity). Who knew Snooki would become a household name or that The Situation would do a stint on Dancing With the Stars? Guantanamo is still open. Time to waterboard the whole cast.

Page 2 will miss the Christine O'Donnell "I'm not a witch" ad. The witch community obviously turned out in force to vote against her. . . . Regardless of your political affiliation, you had to be a little amused by the ad of Jon Runyan dressed as a donkey farmer. Sources confirm the donkeys were named Freddie Mitchell, Shawn Andrews, and Stacy Andrews. . . . Jerry Jones apologized to Cowboys fans after Dallas fell to 1-6. Strangely, he did not offer to refund season-ticket holders after bilking poor, put-upon Texans out of their money. . . . There's a radio ad for the Chase Freedom card that offers people the opportunity to meet "Eagles greats" such as "DeSean Jackson, LeSean McCoy, Brent Celek, and Riley Cooper." The "and Riley Cooper" part gets me every time. Next up, a promotion that will allow you to meet 76ers great Spencer Hawes. . . . Page 2's Fantasy Football chat returns to Philly.com on Thursday at 1 p.m. Together, we'll determine the best moves for your teams. It's democracy in action - or inaction, depending on your perspective.