LINDSAY LOHAN scored a rare bicoastal twofer Thursday, as she was charged with crimes in New York and Los Angeles, making us wonder if "Liz & Dick" would have been better if she played both Liz and Dick.
Prosecutors in Santa Monica charged Lindsay with three misdemeanors related to a June auto accident. Hours earlier, she was arrested and charged with third-degree assault, also a misdemeanor, after a woman was punched in a New York City nightclub.
And Lindsay allegedly was the puncher.
The California charges came about six months after Lindsay's Porsche crashed into the back of a dump truck, where the former child star was probably hoping to find her career. She told police her assistant was driving, but detectives now believe Lindsay was behind the wheel.
In that case, Lindsay was charged with lying to police, reckless driving ("Wait, that's a crime?") and obstructing a police officer from performing duties.
In New York, her attorney, Mark Heller, said he expects the assault charge to be dismissed.
"Once again, Lindsay Lohan is a victim of someone trying to capture their 15 minutes of fame," Heller wrote in a statement. "From my initial investigation, I am completely confident that this case will be concluded favorably and that Lindsay will be totally exonerated."
That's right, folks, Lindsay is again the victim.
Even a toddler figures out to stop touching the oven after getting burned a few times. Why can't Lindsay figure out that a nightclub at 4 a.m. is her hot stove?
The latest California charges could trigger another probation violation for the former teen starlet, who was ordered to stay out of trouble when she was released from supervised probation in March after being convicted of the misdemeanor theft of a necklace and two DUI charges.
Since then, Lindsay has been arrested twice in New York, crashed her car on Pacific Coast Highway, been treated by paramedics in her hotel room, and gotten in an argument with her mother that prompted a 9-1-1 call.
Her arrest at 4 a.m. Thursday occurred after Lindsay got into a spat with a woman at Club Avenue in the Chelsea area of Manhattan. (Like that old commercial for the Army, Lindsay does more before 4 a.m. than most people do all day.) The woman was punched in the face and did not require medical attention, authorities said.
For someone who's been in the joint as much as Lindsay, you would figure that by now she'd at least have a punch that would require medical attention.
24/7 Dan Gross
According to our hardworking colleague's blog phillygossip.com, Flyers owner Ed Snider and Lin Spivak are engaged, Snider confirmed Thursday morning.
"We are very happy together," Snider said through Comcast-Spectacor spokesman Ike Richman. They declined to provide specifics but SportsInput.com reported recently that Snider proposed to Spivak at a "swanky restaurant in Santa Barbara."
Hey, there's no hockey. May as well get married.
- Daily News wire services contributed to this report.