Friday, August 29, 2014
Inquirer Daily News

The intro says it all

When you go to a bookstore, would you rather buy the book with the line, “This book is about a woman’s adventure and coming of age,” or the one with the line, “Read a rare tale about a woman’s 14-month trek through the Amazon to learn about love, hope, passion, and most importantly, herself”?  I know which I’d buy, and I’d venture to say that you would, too.  

On most of the dating sites, just a few words of your profile are shown.  Someone needs to actively click on you to see the rest.  For that reason, it’s important to make the first sentence memorable in order to catch someone’s attention and make him or her want to click in the first place. 

Believe it or not, when perusing online dating profiles, people are often using the same criteria as those from the bookstore.  I’m not saying that you have to include mystery, intrigue, and drama all within one sentence.  (In fact, drama is usually something people do not want to see in an online dating profile!)  What I am saying, though, is that you should consider the first line of your profile as a “hook.”  It should be something to draw people in.  With so many people using online dating sites and so many profiles to weed through, it’s best to take that one extra step to make sure you’re catching someone’s eye.  

Below are some real examples from popular online dating sites of boring opening lines.  And then I’ll show a few examples that make the cut. 

  • Yes, I am single. I am throwing it out there! 

I sure hope you’re single if you’re using online dating!

  • For the past few years, I’ve lived under the assumption that I’d meet someone in my normal circles of work, friends, and activities.

I’d say most people would have made that assumption.  La dee da.

  • So… I have never done this online dating thing before, and I’m still on the fence about how I feel about it. 

This one is not only boring, but it’s also negative. 

  • I enjoy life and like to have fun. 

This is the worst!  Raise your hand if you don’t enjoy life and like to have fun.  I better not see any hands raised!

Ready for the examples of some great intros?  Here we go.

 

  • Pick me, pick me!  As a teacher, this phrase is all too familiar. 

 

Not only does this line show that the online dater is a teacher, but it also shows that she has a sense of humor.  Well done.  She gets an A+.

  • Being an engineer, the last time I wrote this profile, I approached it like a car engine… it functioned okay and got 32 miles/gallon, but it didn’t attract women.  (This was kind of a problem.) 

He’s able to make fun of himself.  Many people see this as a very attractive quality in a partner since he doesn’t take himself too seriously. 

  • I like extra salted buttered popcorn and malt balls at the movies.

She sounds like fun.  Heck – I want to get to know her!

  • Most people say that they don’t want drama in a relationship, right?  But what if your partner’s a theater teacher?  I think I just found the loophole.

This is hysterical.  Not only is it a commentary on dating, but it also shares what she does for a living and shows that she has a clever sense of humor. 

Even if two profiles were identical except for the first line, would you rather read one from the first grouping or one from the second?  Don’t let people pass you by simply because your first line bored them to sleep.  Remember: When they go to the online dating bookstore, you want them to leave with your profile… or at least smile and send you an email to say hello.

More coverage
  • What dating now needs from dating back then
  • First date advice for meeting your special online someone
  • Looking for love? Watch your credit score
  • Erika Ettin alittlenudge.com
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