In life, when we want something, we often have to take a risk. Want a new job? Better put together that resume and send it into the ether for your potential new employers to see. Want to be a success in business? Perhaps quit a job (as I did) or invest in something (or someone) you’re not 100% sure about. Want to meet the right partner? Join an online dating site, go to a speed-dating event, or even just tell friends you’re single and you’re willing to be set up. Rarely do the things we want in life the most come to us neatly wrapped with a bow on top. Even the most successful people know this.
Lewis Katz, who very unfortunately passed away this weekend in a plane crash, as most of us in the area know, took many risks. He bought companies, he went against the grain, he started charter schools, and he succeeded. He could have gone the traditional route and worked at a law firm his whole life, but he didn’t. He was also my dad’s law partner at Katz, Ettin & Levine in Cherry Hill, so he meant a lot to our family.
In keeping with the theme of taking chances, when dating, it’s important to put yourself out there to get what you want. Why do many of us think happiness will simply find us when we least expect it? A client even recently emailed me about a guy who, unfortunately, didn’t work out in the relationship department. She wrote, “I just wanted the easy route, which was a guy who liked me to show up and be perfect, but I guess that has kind of a fairy tale ring to it. Oh well.” Sadly, as she’s starting to realize, that’s just not how it works. In online dating, and dating in general, good things don’t come to those who wait. Good things come to the proactive.
Many people go online or go to a speed-dating event and expect to find their “one and only” simply by signing up or logging in. It takes a bit more energy than that. But don’t worry—all of the effort isn’t for naught. Let’s look at a few steps in the process: